


the party at the edge of forever

by Cinaed



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Complete, F/F, Femslash, Flirting, Interplanetary Travel, Multiple Relationships, Music, Partying, Reunions, Rough Kissing, Rough Sex, Season/Series 15 Spoilers, Seduction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-15
Updated: 2018-02-11
Packaged: 2019-03-05 08:50:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 20,514
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13384344
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cinaed/pseuds/Cinaed
Summary: Kai knew exactly how long she could last on her own in Blood Gulch without even Vic for company before things got fucking depressing: six months. She’d learned that the hard way back on Earth, when she’d gotten so bored of partying and drugs and so lonely for Dex that she’d joined the military in hopes of finding him. It was time to find her brother.Her first stop? Chorus.





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

> So this started as just a "Sister joins the band post-Season 15 and hooks up with Carolina" fic, as per an awesome nonny's request on FFA, but became a "Sister flirts with all the ladies and parties hard on Chorus and hooks up with Carolina on retirement moon" fic along the way. 
> 
> The title is just a play on the Star Trek episode "The City on the Edge of Forever." 
> 
> The endgame pairing is Carolina/Sister, but Sister also flirts or hooks up with Four Seven Niner, Dr. Grey, and Katie Jensen along the way. And some background Jensen/Palomo and implied Grif/Simmons once Sister actually gets to that reunion. 
> 
> This will be updated every other weekend until it's complete! Hope you enjoy!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After that hot reporter chick had left, Kai wandered down into the caves to see what Vic had told her about Dexter. It took her awhile to realize Vic wasn’t there, not just sulking that the newcomers hadn’t given into his demand to be murdered. Wow, had the chick actually killed him? That was cold. Kai knew he’d been begging for it, but still.
> 
> It also meant she was now completely alone in Blood Gulch. “Fuck!”

After that hot reporter chick had left, Kai wandered down into the caves to see what Vic had told her about Dexter. It took her awhile to realize Vic wasn’t there, not just sulking that the newcomers hadn’t given into his demand to be murdered. Wow, had the chick actually killed him? That was cold. Kai knew he’d been begging for it, but still.

It also meant she was now completely alone in Blood Gulch. “Fuck!”

Kai knew exactly how long she could last on her own before things got fucking depressing: six months. She’d learned that the hard way back on Earth, when she’d gotten so bored of partying and drugs and so lonely for Dex that she’d joined the military in hopes of finding him.

This time she had her business to keep her busy, but she’d have to relocate somewhere with people. The only question was where. She drank a can of beer, crushed it, and threw it at Vic’s dark screen for leaving her like a pussy. Then she folded her arms and thought. Earth was out. The UNSC might actually expect her to do military stuff. Most of the planets in this quadrant were lame as fuck, even with her awesome parties to liven up everyone’s sad lives. Maybe it was time for a new scene.

She remembered that sudden burst of joy, better than any drug, when she’d watched the video of her brother and his friends standing up against some evil businessman dude or corrupt government guy or whatever they’d been doing. Her big bro, alive and apparently a fucking hero. What had that planet been called? Something musical. Aria? Cadence? No, Chorus.

Kai had sent a message there after seeing her brother on the news, calling Dexter out for not fucking letting her know he wasn’t dead. There hadn’t been a response. She’d sent a second one a month or two ago, but it probably hadn’t reached Chorus before the UNSC had declared them all terrorists and set up a blockade of all supplies and information.

Well, Chorus had had a shitty decade or two. They probably needed a few parties.

 

* * *

 

“Private Grif, you are not authorized to pass through the blockade,” said a colonel whose name was apparently Dawson. Kai had been mentally calling him Colonel Fuckface since he’d first called Dex a terrorist during this sad attempt at an interrogation or whatever it was supposed to be. He hadn’t even threatened her with knives or needles or anything hot when grilling her about her brother. He frowned earnestly. “I’m afraid that you need to return to Blood Gulch immediately.”

Kai squinted at him. When it became clear that he was actually serious, she snorted. “Um, fuck that. I flew my ass all the way here. I’m going down to Chorus.”  

Colonel Fuckface leaned forward, steepling his fingers like some James Bond villain or judgmental principal. His eyes narrowed. “I don’t think you understand the gravity of the situation, private. Your brother is a suspected terrorist, and now you’re trying to visit a planet run by the anarchists he works for.” Before she could say anything, he frowned. “I know, I know. You keep saying that it isn’t your intention to join your brother in his illegal activities. That you are here, in fact, to throw some parties. You must understand that it sounds unbelievable.”

“Uh, no, I don’t, because it’s true. I’m here to throw some parties while you guys get your shit together and figure out that my brother isn’t a terrorist and that it’s all conspiracy bullshit like the moon landing and--”

“ _The moon landing_?” Colonel Fuckface squawked. His face reddened. His steepled fingers became clenched fists on his desk. “You… You’re kidding, right? How can you possibly believe that old conspiracy? _Obviously_ the moon landing was real because we’re all in outer space right now! _”_  

“Or are we?” Kai said knowingly, tapping the side of her nose. “Maybe this is all some Matrix-level shit.”

Colonel Fuckface sighed. “Please, Private Grif. Take this seriously. You aren’t visiting Chorus, and that is a direct command from the UNSC and Alfred Packard himself. There is no way for you to get through this blockade, so you should just go back to Blood Gulch.”

Kai squinted at him again. She thought quickly. Time to fall back on what she’d learned dealing with cops, since this guy might as well have been one of those downer assholes. Plan A, which was being belligerent as hell until they gave up in annoyance probably wouldn’t work. Plan B it was. She slumped in her seat, faking disappointment. “Ugh, this fucking blows.”

Colonel Fuckface straightened. He looked relieved. “You’ll go back to Blood Gulch then?”

“Yeah, if you guys are gonna be hard-asses about it.” She threw in a deep sigh for good measure, and had the satisfaction of watching Colonel Fuckface’s eyes drop to her chest. She’d definitely made the right decision to skip the armor and wear a tank top and booty shorts when the soldiers had ordered her off her Pelican and into this room. She sighed again, more deeply. “Can I at least stick around for a couple days? Flying alone in a Pelican for like two weeks is boring as hell.”

Wow, turned out even dicks could smile. Colonel Fuckface practically beamed at her once he’d jerked his eyes guiltily away from her rack. “We’re a bit busy here with the blockade, but if you’d like to take a vacation, might I suggest Harmony? It’s the closest planet to Chorus, just a three-day flight away. While it’s certainly, ah, rustic compared to Earth, I suspect that it would feel practically urbane after Blood Gulch.” He chuckled as though he’d said something clever, and Kai dutifully faked a laugh.

“Sure, just put the coordinates in my Pelican.”  

She started to stand up, and Colonel Fuckface grabbed her hand. She endured it and that earnest look of his. He said quickly, “Private Grif, if you have any way of communicating with your brother, I strongly urge you to convince him to turn himself in.” He paused and lowered his voice. “I’d hate for anything to happen to him.”

Kai knew he was talking shit -- there was no way Dexter would be lame enough to let himself get killed by the UNSC -- but still her stomach twisted into a knot. She’d thought she’d lost him before. She didn’t want to _actually_ lose him. “I told you, I don’t know where the fuck he is,” she snapped, yanking her hand away and glaring. “And if I did, I’d tell him to stop dicking around and give you guys some evidence to clear his name. You know why? Because my brother isn’t a fucking terrorist.”

“Maybe you’re right, private,” said Colonel Fuckface, though he clearly didn’t believe it. “For your brother’s sake, I hope this is all some horrible misunderstanding. I’ll get you those coordinates for Harmony.”

“Good,” she said, and stormed out while he was still looking sorry for her.

She fumed all the way back to her Pelican and on the three-day flight to Harmony. She was still fuming when she found the grungiest, most run down bar in Harmony’s capital and kicked open the door. The music stopped. Everyone turned to stare at her.

“Hey, assholes! Know anyone who’ll smuggle me to Chorus for five hundred dollars?”

 

* * *

 

“Man, I’ve done a lot of illegal shit, but I’ve never run a blockade before,” Kai informed the pilot, who was either ignoring her or good at multitasking, because she was bent over Pelican’s panels, jerry-rigging a few things to supposedly make the Pelican faster and harder for any of the UNSC ships to detect. From her shorn hair and ex-military gait, Kai figured the pilot had gone AWOL or been kicked out. That was pretty hot. She’d always had a thing for chicks who defied authority. Kai had a thought. “Oh, we should totally have badass code names!”

The woman’s shoulders tensed. “No thanks. I’m not calling anyone by a code name.”

Kai pouted. “Aw, come on, bitch. It’d be awesome!”

The pilot straightened and turned. Her smile had too many teeth. She reminded Kai of that lioness at the zoo Grif had taken to her a couple times when they were kids, before their mom had joined the circus. The lioness had shown her teeth just like that before kicking the ass of a lion who’d been bothering her. “No thanks,” she said again. “Code names go with a short life expectancy.”

“Aww.” Kai sighed. “Then what should I call you? We’re on this ship together for like three days. I’m not just saying like ‘Hey you’ or ‘Hey, bitch’ the entire time. I mean, I _could_ , but it seems rude.”

The other woman hesitated. Then she shrugged. “Just call me Niner.”

“Niner? Okay, that-- wait. That sounds like a code name.” She jabbed an accusing finger at Niner, whose smile went lopsided with genuine amusement. “You said no code names!”

“No, I said I wasn’t calling _you_ by a code name.”

“Bitch,” Kai muttered, but grinned appreciatively. “What about the short life expectancy?”

Niner flashed that lioness smile again. “Exception to the rule, I guess. Lucky me.”

Kai watched her bend back over the panels. The woman had stripped to an undershirt to tinker with the Pelican, so Kai let herself admire the pale scars and all the coiled muscle in her arms. Niner had a tattoo half-hidden by her shirt, something that might’ve been wings and definitely had the word scientia under it. Fuck, tattoos were hot. She wondered if Niner had any more. Kai shifted in place. She opened her mouth to ask when Niner thought they could leave. Instead a hopeful “So, you like ladies at all?” came out.

Niner glanced over her shoulder. This smile had a different quality to it. “Sorry,” she said, sounding like she meant it. “I don’t mix business with pleasure anymore.”

Kai sighed. So far this trip to Chorus had been full of disappointments. She shrugged and smiled to show no hard feelings. “I get it. So when do you think we can leave?”

Niner tilted her head and thought for a minute. “That depends. If you want more heart to hearts, maybe a couple hours. If you shut up for twenty minutes, probably, I don’t know, about twenty minutes.”

“Bitch,” Kai said again, laughing, and Niner grinned back before she got back to work.

 

* * *

 

Four rifles pointed at Kai as soon as she stepped off the Pelican’s gangway onto Chorus’s surface. Niner had picked a spot about twenty miles outside the new capital, figuring it gave them a better chance to land undetected. Apparently she’d been right about escaping the UNSC’s eyes, but not the Chorus military. A jeep had pulled up as they’d landed and four soldiers had jumped out with guns ready.

Kai stopped, raising her eyebrows behind her helmet. “Whoa, chill out, dudes.”

“Ma’am, put your hands over your head and stay where you are!" one of the soldiers ordered. "You are under arrest for landing on Chorus soil without proper authorization. To whoever is piloting the airship, please come out with your hands up as well!”

“Ma’am? What the fuck, dude, I’m like twenty-four,” Kai said, but put her hands over her head. Behind her, she heard Niner sigh and walk down the gangway as well. “Is this Chorus’s welcoming committee? Because I gotta say, not real welcoming, fuckheads. If this is how you usually greet people, no wonder the UNSC is blockading your asses.”

The rifles didn’t waver, although the spokesman’s voice did as he asked, “Are you here to speak on behalf of the UNSC? Because, uh, we weren’t informed that Mr. Packard--”

Kai made a face. “Uh, fuck no. The UNSC ordered me not to come here. Why do you think we were stealthy as fuck getting planet-side? Can I put my arms down now?”

“No! State your name and your purpose for coming to Chorus!”

Niner said from the corner of her mouth, “Unless there’s a reason not to, maybe tell them why you’re here? I’m not really a fan of guns pointed at my face. It hurts my feelings.”

Kai glanced around at the soldiers clutching their rifles. She was beginning to think maybe Chorus wouldn’t be as fun as she’d hoped, if they were all so trigger-happy. She frowned. “I am here for two reasons, assholes. First, if my fucking brother is here, I’m here to kick his ass. Second, if you guys are down to party, I am here to throw some bomb-ass festivals and shit.”

There was a pause. “What?”

“Fuck,” Kai said. “I _said--_ Can I take my fucking helmet off?”

“Uh, sure.” Apparently feeling that didn’t show proper authority, the spokesman added quickly, “But no funny business!”  

Kai took off her helmet and shook out her hair. Helmet hair was such a bitch. “Like I was saying if you dickweasels would listen, I’m here either to kick Dex’s ass or throw some bitching parties. So, what’ll it be? Is Dexter here? If he’s not, do you guys want to party?”  

There was another pause. As one, the soldiers glanced at Niner, who shrugged and said, “Look, I’m just a simple woman trying to make my way through the universe. She paid me five hundred dollars to get through the blockade. That’s all I know.”

The spokesman stepped forward, still under the protective cover of his fellow soldiers. Kai got the feeling that he was staring at her. “Um, ma’am. Did I hear you correctly? You ran a blockade, disobeyed UNSC direct orders, and paid this pilot five hundred dollars to get to Chorus to...find your brother and, uh, party?”

“Finally you’re listening! Yes!”

“Wait, Matthews. She said Dexter,” one of the soldiers said suddenly. “And look at her! They could be twins!” At least that’s what Kai thought she said. Girl had a major speech impediment or something. Or just braces, Kai learned, because the soldier took off her helmet and flashed a smile that was more metal than teeth. She also still looked like she belonged in high school. Her eyes were wide and hopeful. “Ma’am, you don’t happen to mean Captain Dexter Grif, do you?”

“ _Captain_ Grif? When the fuck did Big Bro get promoted?”

“You’re Captain Grif’s sister?!” Matthews sounded horrified. He lowered his rifle and whipped off his helmet. He looked awestruck and just as young as the girl. “Ma’am, I am so sorry! If I’d known, I would’ve-- I would never knowingly disrespect-- Jesus, Smith, Bitters, put the rifles down!” This last part was hissed at the other soldiers, who both looked down at their rifles as though they’d forgotten they were holding guns and hastily lowered them. Matthews smiled anxiously at her and thrust his hand forward. “Let me be the first to welcome you to Chorus. It’s an honor to meet Captain Grif’s sister! He’s such a great man.”

Kai let his hand hang in the air, and looked at the girl. “Please tell me not everyone on this planet kisses Dex’s ass like that.”

One of the other soldiers snorted. “Nah. I mean, most people look up to him because he helped Chorus, but Matthews here has a Master’s degree in ass-kissing.”

“Bitters,” Matthews half-snapped, half-whined.

Bitters ignored him. “But if you’re looking for your brother, he isn’t here. Sorry.”  

Kai was sorry that she’d taken her helmet off. It was hard to hide the crushing disappointment that slammed into her chest like a two-by-four. She bit her lip and swallowed until the ache in her throat eased and she wasn’t going to cry like a little bitch. “And you don’t know where he…?”

She stopped. Everyone was shaking their heads. The last soldier, Smith, said, “The president might know, but it’s a pretty big secret. Especially with the UNSC breathing down our necks and calling us all terrorists. If we don’t know, we can’t accidentally tell the UNSC anything if they invade.”

“You mean _when_ they invade,” Bitters said darkly. "So much for the war being over."   

Kai sighed. “ _Fuck_. Oh well, I guess anywhere would be better than here, since the UNSC has a stick up its ass. They refused to listen when I told them that Dex would never kill innocent people.” A thought occurred to her, probably about three days too late. She glanced over at Niner. “Uh, Niner, so with the blockade, it might be hard to get you back out. I’m sticking around here, so if you want, you can borrow my Pelican. Mind bringing it back around when this blockade and all the stupid shit is over with?”

Niner hadn’t taken off her helmet, but somehow still managed to radiate surprise. “You’re serious? Wow, you _are_ serious. You really trust me not to take it and run?”

Kai laughed. “No, bitch. If you never came back, I’d track you down and beat your ass for screwing me over. Especially when you didn’t bother to even screw me first!”

“Um,” the girl said faintly, beginning to flush. Her eyes darted between Kai and Niner. “We’re of course happy to provide a place to stay and food for Captain Grif’s sister and her friends! I’m sure that the president would insist on it. In fact, we should probably take you straight to the president or Dr. Grey!” Then she grimaced. “Although with the blockade, we’re running a little low on supplies.” Her expression brightened. “At least the crops that Private DuFresne and Private Donut helped us plant are thriving, so we do have fresh fruits and vegetables!”

Kai’s mouth watered. “Fresh fruit? Like, what, apples? Pears? Holy fuck, do you know how long it’s been since I’ve had anything but MREs and other packaged shit? The only fresh food we had was Doc and Donut’s vegetable garden with beans and carrots, and I totally forgot to water them so they died, like, as soon as those guys left Blood Gulch.”

“We definitely have apples,” said the girl, beaming. “Oh, um, we should probably introduce ourselves! I’m Lieutenant Jensen, that’s Lieutenant Matthews, that’s Lieutenant Bitters, and that’s Lieutenant Smith. We served under the Reds and Blues during the war! It’s so nice to meet you!”

“You too. I’m Kaikaina Grif.” She studied the young faces and felt a twinge of unease. “So, are all the soldiers on Chorus jail-bait, or….?” If they were, Kai was going to seriously regret all of her choices.

“Um, we’re all adults,” Jensen said, looking adorably confused. Then the blush appeared in her cheeks again. “Though after, uh, an incident last year, there are a lot of babies and new parents. None of us have kids though!”

“Thank God,” Bitters muttered. “Can you imagine Palomo with a kid?”

Jensen bristled. “I think Charlie would be a great father!” Then her eyes widened. “Oh wow, I can’t wait to tell him that Captain Grif’s sister is here! He’ll be so excited!”

Kai bored of the conversation. She looked at Niner. “So, what’s your plan?”

“I think flying right back out is asking for my luck to stretch a little far. I’ll stick around for a few days.” Niner paused, and Kai could hear her smile as she added, “Besides, I’ll kick myself if I skip your party.”

“You would. I throw the motherfucking _best_ parties,” Kai informed her. Then she blinked as the lieutenants surrounded her, talking excitedly. They’d all taken off their helmets, and even Smith and Bitters looked barely old enough to vote, much less drink.

“I had the honor of serving under Captain Caboose, Ms. Grif, but your brother is a true hero,” Smith said, his face shining with sincerity. “If you need anything, please let me know.”

Bitters snorted. “Yeah, well, I served under your brother, and he was a lazy asshole. But he did actually stick around and kick Hargrove’s ass. So I guess he wasn’t a total loser. And we owe him or whatever.”

“Antoine, _please_ ,” Matthews hissed, looking scandalized as Kai squinted at Bitters and tried to decide if she needed to defend Dexter’s honor. Then he laughed, a little high-pitched. “Sorry, ma’am, Bitters’ sense of humor can be a little weird. Just ignore him.”

“If you call me ma’am one more time, I’m going to slap you,” Kai informed him. She felt a little bad when Matthews looked like she’d kicked his puppy. She rolled her eyes. “Call me Kaikaina.”

“Oh no, I couldn’t,” Matthews said, even as Jensen lit up brighter than a candle and said, “That’s such a pretty name! I’m Katie.”

“Katie, huh?” Kai smiled at her. She wasn’t the type of girl Kai went for -- she liked them meaner -- but she was cute. Maybe Chorus wouldn’t suck after all. “How about we go to the capital and you show me and Niner around? Or meet the president or whatever?”

“Of course!” Katie’s face fell. “It’s going to be a tight squeeze to fit everyone in the Jeep though…. We’re going to have to double up.”

“Shotgun,” Kai said immediately, and then winked at both women. “Just don’t fight over who gets to sit in my lap. There’s enough of me to go around, bitches.”

In the end, Katie sat in her lap, Smith drove, Niner got a seat of her own, and Matthews perched uncomfortably in Bitters’. Kai enjoyed the ride.

 

* * *

 

The president turned out to be a hot, tired chick named Kimball who asked to speak with Kai alone. Kimball took one look at her and said dryly, “Well, I can see why the lieutenants were so certain you are who you claim to be. You and Captain Grif could be twins.”

“Your lieutenant Matthews kept calling me ma’am. Now you and Jensen said that Dex and I look like twins. Do I look as old as Big Bro? He sure fucking doesn’t look my age. Did Colonel Fuckface make me age ten years from that boring interrogation?” Kai scowled and ran a hand over her face. She couldn’t feel any wrinkles. “I need a mirror.”

Kimball’s weary eyes sharpened. “Interrogation?”

Kai waved that aside. “Oh yeah, I tried to visit Chorus like a week ago, and this colonel dude stopped me at the blockade and questioned me for ages.” She mimicked Colonel Fuckface’s voice. “Private Grif, do you realize there’s a blockade? Private Grif, why do you want to visit a planet controlled by suspected terrorists? Private Grif, when’s the last time you spoke to your brother? Did you know what he had planned? Do you know what he plans to do next?” She shook her head. “What a dickhead.”

Kimball wore an unreadable look. “And what did you tell him?”

“That I don’t know jackshit about terrorists, except that Dex isn’t one. Besides, even if he broke the law somehow, I'd never narc on him. He’s my _brother_.” Kai looked at Kimball. This was the woman the UNSC claimed had sent her brother and his friends to attack UNSC bases and kill people. She didn’t look like someone who’d do that. She looked like someone who needed a week-long nap. Or a nice weekend fuck. Still, hope filled her. If anyone knew where her brother was, this woman would. “Do you know where Big Bro is?”

Kimball frowned. She hesitated for a moment, and then looked up. “Well?” she said to the ceiling.

Kai jumped as a huge glowing alien fuck appeared. She stared wide-eyed as it bent its enormous head towards her and studied her with burning red eyes. “She seems to be sincere,” it said. “Though her thought processes are...strange. Would you like to like to know her greatest fear, President Kimball?”

Kai narrowed her eyes. “Is that a threat? Cause I don’t care if you’re some alien hologram, I’ll kick your ass, cockbite.”

“My name is not Cockbite. It is Santa.”

“No the fuck it isn’t!” Kai said with feeling. “Santa isn’t an alien.” Then she thought about it. “Wait, shit, that would make sense. Like, alien technology explains _everything_. Flying around the world and all the colonies in one night? All those gifts? Holy shit! Who else knows about this?! When we fought the aliens, were we killing the Easter Bunny too?”

“Private Grif,” Kimball said loudly, cutting through her minor freak-out.

“What?!” Kai snapped. When Kimball’s eyebrows rose, Kai remembered who she was. Could you get thrown in jail for yelling at the president?

Kimball shook her head. When she spoke, her voice was gentle. “A few weeks ago, I could have told you where your brother was, but now I honestly don’t know his location. Someone passed along a message to the Reds and Blues for me. The best I can tell, they left that same day with the messengers, without discussing their destination with anyone on Chorus.”

Hope soured in Kai’s throat. She’d missed Dexter by _weeks_? “Ugh, damn it. I know our mom always forgets to leave forward addresses for the circus, but I thought Dexter would be better about it.” Or at least respond to her letters. 

“The circus?” Kimball repeated, looking briefly intrigued, and then shook her head again. “I’m sorry, Private Grif. However, what Lieutenant Jensen told you is correct. Chorus is happy to have you here. Hopefully once this misunderstanding with the UNSC is resolved, Captain Grif and the others will come back this way.”

“Yeah.” Kai pushed her disappointment down and squared her shoulders. At least she still had her business as a distraction. “So, madam president. How do you feel about parties?”

Kimball blinked. “Excuse me?”

“How do you feel about parties? I know you’ve got a food shortage, but if I could pull off a rave with just myself, a boring old guy, and a hot robot in Blood Gulch, I can throw a bitching party with no food here. Or maybe you guys are cool enough for a music festival! Fuck, please say you guys will do a music festival, or a film fest. Just don’t be nerds and want another Comic-con. I mean, I’ll do it, because I am fucking professional, but like, I could throw the _best_ music festival.”

Kimball frowned, puzzled, at her. “I’m sorry, I think I missed something. You want to throw a festival on Chorus?”

“Uh, hell yeah! A couple of them! When’s the last time you guys did something fun?”

“Fun?” Kimball repeated, like Kai had started speaking Spanish. “Well, I don’t--”

“A music festival sounds like an excellent idea, if somewhat implausible at the moment!” a new voice said, and Kai spun to find another woman standing in the doorway. She wore doctor’s white lab coat and had her black hair pulled up in a messy bun. There was a manic energy that Kai liked in her dark eyes. “Research has shown that music engages the neocortex of our brain, which calms us and reduces impulsivity. With all the blockade and this unfortunate misunderstanding with the UNSC, people could use some sort of distraction. We’ve come a long way since the civil war, but a year isn’t enough to heal all wounds. Or even most of them! People are getting paranoid again.” In the same cheerful voice, she added, “We have a large rate of disabled veterans, and with that nasty blockade, it’s very difficult to get medical supplies in. The UNSC claims that they’re letting medical supply ships through, but frankly, they’re lying through their teeth. Most of our amputees have had to make due with out-of-date prostheses, and--”

“And until the blockade is lifted, there’s nothing we can do about that. But a film fest does seem doable, if Private Grif has any films,” Kimball said, sighing. She rubbed at her eyes. “Private Grif, this is Dr. Grey, head doctor at the General Doyle General Hospital. Dr. Grey, this is Private Grif, Captain Grif’s sister. Apparently she throws bitching parties.” A hint of amusement crept into her tired voice.

“Oh, I see the resemblance,” Dr. Grey chirped. She smiled. “Please, let me know if I can help with your party planning in any way.”

“ _Well_ ,” Kai began, about to ask if Dr. Grey could hook her up. Doctors always had the best shit. Then she remembered about the blockade, which meant drugs were probably in short supply, and the fact that the president of the planet was standing right there and definitely seemed like a teetotaler. “Uh, I’ll let you know.”

Dr. Grey paced across the room, looking at her like she was an unexpected treat. It was kind of hot, though the hotness was tempered a little with Dr. Grey’s thoughtful, “You know, I never did get to finish my psych evaluation of your brother. His neuroses were so fascinating! I’d _love_ to pick your brain about your childhood.”

“Emily,” Kimball said disapprovingly, but Dr. Grey’s smile didn’t falter.

Yeah, the lady was definitely crazy. The only question was if she brought that crazy with her in bed. Kai grinned. “I don’t talk about my childhood until the third date. But I put out on the first. Just FYI.”

Kimball raised both eyebrows, but Dr. Grey giggled. “I’ll keep that in mind! Now, I have a few things I need to discuss with President Kimball, and I believe your pilot friend and your fan club are waiting outside for you. Have a lovely day!”

Kai heard the steel behind the cheerful words. “You too, Dr. Grey. I’m going to do a tour of the city, take some impromptu surveys and see what kind of parties people want.” She finger gunned at Dr. Grey. “Just remember. Third date.”

Outside, her little weird entourage was waiting for her. Even Niner lingered at the edge of the group. “Yo,” Kai said, giving them all a thumbs up. “Good job electing a hot president. She’s much better to look at than Earth’s gross old dude.”

“Um, we actually elected her because she led the New Republic through the last months of the war and is an excellent leader, but you’re right. She _is_ really pretty,” Katie agreed cheerfully. “Where do you want to go?”

“You guys have any bars?”

Kai could hear the grin in Bitters’ voice when he said, “Lady, both the Feds and the rebels survived on MREs and moonshine during the war. Now with all the shortages, the only thing we're not in short supply of is alcohol.”

“That’s a gross exaggeration,” Matthews said with a frown. “Don’t make Chorus sound pathetic, Bitters. We’re bearing up very well under the blockade. But if you really do want to go to a bar, ma-- er, Private Grif, there are a few options.”

Kai shrugged. “Eh, whatever’s closest. I’m not picky. I just wanna get wasted.”

“Now _that_ sounds fun,” said Niner, at the same time Bitters jerked a thumb over his shoulder and said, “In that case, this way.”

“Hey,” Kai said as she walked. “What kind of stuff are you guys into?” Most of the group paused and stared at her. Niner, her helmet tucked under one arm, grinned. Kai played back her question in her mind and laughed. “Not _that_ kind of fun! At least not right now. I told the prez and that crazy doctor that I’d see what kind of parties people wanted. Back in Blood Gulch, I threw raves, a film fest, a Comic-con, an eco-con, all that shit. And I always wanted to do a music festival. So?”

“Oh, uh, the Comic-con sounds fun,” Matthews said, because of course he did.

Bitters coughed out, “Nerd.”

“A film fest would be amazing!” Katie said. “We rebuilt the movie theater, but we only have like five movies that survived the destruction of Armonia.”

“Yeah,” Smith said feelingly. “I’m tired of crying over _Homeward Bound_.” A sound like a shuddering breath escaped his helmet. “I just keep worrying about Shadow, you know? I mean, we all know he makes it, but still.”

“Did you bring movies?” Bitters asked her, sounding genuinely interested for the first time. “We’re in the assfuck of nowhere, and new movies were hard to come by even before the war. We’re like ten years behind.”

Kai was struck with pity. “Oh shit. You guys haven’t seen the new Space Battles XXII movie!”

Matthews’ voice squeaked. “A new Space Battles came out?! Oh my god, did Suzume finally find out her parentage? Did she defeat the evil Prince? Did--”

“Dude, don’t ask her for spoilers!” Bitters hissed. Then he coughed and tried to sound indifferent. “Uh. So. You have that on a flash drive or something? Like, on you? Because, uh, after we go to the bar, I’ve got a laptop at my place, and Matthews has a projector and speakers. We could watch it, I guess. I think Matthews might explode if he has to wait.”

Bitters was trying to save face, but he wasn’t wrong. Matthews was vibrating in place. She shrugged. The flash drive was in the storage space in her armor, along with some emergency snacks. “Sure. Just get me wasted first and it’s a deal.”

“ _The bar is right there_!” Matthews shouted and bolted for a nearby building.

Katie watched him run. Then she said, “I think everyone’s going to be glad you came to Chorus, Miss Kaikaina. You make things much less grim! Though I’m sorry that Captain Grif isn’t here. I bet you miss him.”

“Yeah,” Kai said, that lump of disappointment back in her throat. She looked around at the nearly empty street and took a deep breath. Dex had been on this planet, breathed this same air, saved these people. If she stuck around, he’d come back eventually. She had to believe that, even if he’d never come back to Blood Gulch. And then she could kick his ass and make sure he never left her behind again. In the meantime, these kids needed some pop culture rescue, stat.

“Katie!” someone shouted, and Katie turned with a smile and a pleased squeak as someone rushed up and grabbed her shoulders. The man was flushed and breathless, like he’d run a couple miles. “I was at the station, but I got your message! Captain Grif’s sister is here?!”

Kai lifted her hand in a wave. “Hey, dude.”

“Palomo, meet Private Kaikaina Grif. That’s Lieutenant Palomo.”

Palomo stepped away from Katie and then actually saluted Kai. “Wow, um. Hello, ma’am. It’s an honor to meet Captain Grif’s flesh and blood.”

Kai crossed her arms against her chest and glared, even though he couldn’t see her scowl through the face-plate. “Okay, first off? Don’t ever say flesh and blood again unless you decide to start like a cannibal cult or something. Second? Everyone gets one ma’am. Then I start slapping some bitches. Call me Kaikaina. Or Private Grif, you want to be lame.”

Palomo didn’t move, but somehow Kai got the impression that he’d deflated a little. “Um, okay.”

Katie grabbed his arm and shook it. “Charles, she has _movies_! We’re going to a bar, and then we’re going to watch the new Space Battles! Oh man, do you think I should invite my squad, or would that be too tight of a squeeze in your apartment, Bitters?”

Bitters shrugged. “Uh, my apartment fits like three people comfortably, so we’re already going to be crammed in there. The more the fucking merrier, I guess.”

Matthews ran back to them. If anything, he was vibrating even more. “Guys, are we going into the bar? If we go into the bar we can get our drinks. And if we get our drinks we can go to Bitters’ apartment and watch the movie. So are we going? Oh, hey, Palomo. Did Jensen tell you about the movie? Are you a Space Battles fan?”

“Um, is he okay?” Palomo asked.

“Yeah, he’s just a nerd,” Bitters said dryly.

Kai began to walk towards the bar Matthews had just come from. “Come on, losers, I want to try some Chorus moonshine.”

 

* * *

 

It turned out Chorus had some motherfucking strong moonshine. Kai could barely feel her face. She hadn’t had a hangover in years, not since middle school probably, but she was beginning to wonder if she was going to wake up with one tomorrow. It was amazing. She flopped onto Bitters’ couch, and held her arms up in triumph. In one hand was the flash drive. In the other, two Oreo snack packs to share. It had taken a while to get out of her armor, and then to remember how to open the storage compartment, but now she shook the flash drive at everyone.

“Behold, Space Battles!”

A few people cheered.

Bitters’ room was crowded. Katie had decided to invite her squad over after all, and the three girls, Weber, Adebowale, and Nováková, had come bearing blankets, pillows, more alcohol, and a fuckton of giggles. There wasn’t much space, so most people were curled up on the floor, half in each other’s laps.

Matthews took the flash drive from her, looking at it like it was the Holy Grail or a million bucks. His voice was hushed. “And not just Space Battles. You said you have about 70 movies on this flash drive?”

Kai nodded. “Uh, yeah. You never know what genres people will cream themselves over. For all I know, you weirdos love westerns. And I am a fucking professional. I give the people what they want.” She realized that she was still nodding, and stopped. She squinted at the snack packs. “Who wants Oreos? Just don’t tell Big Bro, cause he’d be _pissed_ that I shared them with you guys instead saving them for him. But that’s what he gets for going MIA on me. Dick.”

“I’ll pass them out,” Katie said. She pulled herself out of Palomo’s arms. Apparently she and the guy were a thing, which was a bummer, because Katie seemed too strait-laced for a potential threesome. Oh well, there were still plenty of hot ladies around.

Kai let her take the snacks, and then blinked up at Niner as the woman pressed a glass in her hand. Clear liquid sloshed around. Kai grinned. “Oh, you guys have vodka too? Hell yeah.” She threw it back like a shot, and then coughed at the unexpected lack of a burn. “What the fuck was that?”  

Niner raised an eyebrow. She looked amused. “Water. Maybe you’re not familiar with it?”

Kai bristled. “Bitch, I don’t need water! My blood is like ninety percent alcohol all the time.”

“If you say so,” Niner said, and then sat down next to her.

Kai side-eyed her, and then got distracted by the sharp, beautiful bones of Niner’s face and the hint of that tattoo that still tempted Kai to kiss it. She licked her lips, vaguely aware that Matthews was setting up the projector. “So, hey. You’re sticking around, right?”

Niner’s voice was low, meant for Kai’s ears only, and still a little amused. “Yeah. I thought I’d see some of the sights before the UNSC bombed this place into oblivion. I hear they’ve got some weird alien stuff here.”

“Cool.” Kai leaned a little closer. “Well, you got me to Chorus. That means job done, right? So you wouldn’t be mixing business with pleasure if we bumped uglies?”

Niner’s eyes narrowed thoughtfully. Then she smiled. It was a slow smile, full of promise. She shifted a little on the couch until their knees pressed together. Niner ran hot like the Pelican’s engines, her skin warm even through her thin pants. “I like where your head’s at. Technically I still have your ship, so I don’t know that I’d say the job’s _done_ , but--” She shrugged. “Fuck it.”

“Sweet. After the movie, wanna come back to wherever Katie’s setting me up in style and suck my dick?” Something flickered across Niner’s face, and Kai added with a snicker, “My metaphorical dick. But I’ve got some toys back at the Pelican, if you like that kind of thing.”

“I know you do,” Niner said dryly. “You store them in the bottom compartment of the food storage. I found them on day two of the flight.”

“Oh yeah,” Kai said, and laughed again. People always thought that was weird, but it made sense to her. She shrugged. “Gotta keep your favorite things together, right?”

Whatever Niner was about to say was lost in the sudden blast of the Space Battles theme music. Matthews threw himself down on the floor beside Bitters, clutching his arm. Someone at the back of the room turned off the lights.

In the darkness, she slipped her arm around Niner and let her head rest on Niner’s shoulder. She didn’t bother to watch the movie; Simmons had made everyone in Blood Gulch watch it a million times in that brief time before the UNSC had started their bullshit transfers out of the canyon. She watched the lieutenants instead, their excited faces lit by the explosions bursting upon the screen. They either squirmed with eagerness or sat absolutely still where they sat, enthralled. Smith was chewing on his lip. Matthews was still clutching Bitters. Adebowale actually had her hands over her mouth, as though to keep herself from yelling at the movie.

How long had their dumb civil war gone on, that all their soldiers were still pretty much kids? Kai knew most of them were about her age, but they all looked young, like they had jumped from ten years old to soldiers without any fun teenage years in between. Some of Kai’s moonshine buzz soured, and she frowned in the darkness. Well, fuck that depressing shit. A film fest was definitely happening. In fact, Kai was going to throw _all_ the bitching parties, until her name was as legendary on Chorus as her brother’s.

Yeah. Suck on that, universe.


	2. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kai grinned, winking at Kimball. “Talking revenue streams, shit, do you know how many people would want to visit your weird alien temples? People are crazy about aliens. You’ve got your nerds and historians and especially your alien freaks. If you could talk to Santa, get that Temple of Procreation to act like a roofie on only people willing to pay for it, you--”
> 
> “No!” a half-dozen voices shouted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all your lovely comments! 
> 
> This chapter was also nicknamed "Timeline? What timeline?" because I love Season 15 but also don't...understand the time frame of Season 15, so let's just hand-wave some shit.
> 
> I incorporated a-taller-tale's potential Kaikaina backstory into this fic, because it's a great [backstory](https://a-taller-tale.tumblr.com/post/170118622867/grif-is-drafted-into-the-military-and-the-colony). 
> 
> Enjoy!

“...And that’s why we need a music festival,” Kai concluded, looking around at the council. Most of them nodded, looking thoughtful. They were all pretty cool, despite being government stooges. It probably helped that they were a renegade government, fighting an even bigger Man.

“I agree in part with Private Grif,” Grey said. Grey wasn’t on the elected council, but she, the chief surgeon at the children's hospital, and the president of the newly rebuilt university had unofficial seats in every meeting as civilian voices. Apparently that had something to do with the civil war. “I myself have observed a sharp boost in morale over the last few weeks. People are able to set aside their worries over the UNSC’s potential invasion and instead enjoy the movie marathons and raves.” She paused to giggle and shake her finger at Kai. “Although I could do with a smidge fewer alcohol poisonings, Private Grif! However, with the blockade still strictly enforced and the peace talks proceeding at a snail’s pace, I don’t see how a music festival could happen for the foreseeable future. With the focus of Chorus’s treasury going to infrastructure and the food supply, I doubt that we could afford to host and pay professional musicians even if the UNSC admits its mistake.”

Kai nodded. “Yeah, doc, that’s fair. I was imagining the first music festival would be me blasting my music library and letting people sing along. Sort of like a bitching group version of karaoke, or a rave with less alcohol. You’re right that we can’t do the real deal with the blockade going on, but once it’s done? I will put the UEG and UNSC on blast. Everyone on Earth is gonna hear how the UNSC had their thumbs up their asses and fucked you guys over. Most people will want to help you bitches out.” She knew she'd stuck her foot in her mouth when Kimball’s expression set.

Kimball said stiffly, “We’re not after charity. We want independence from the UEG and compensation from Charon Industries and Malcolm Hargrove’s heirs for what he did.”

Kai frowned. She hadn't meant charity. She tried to think of a better way to explain her idea. She shook her head. “Not charity. Like, music has always been anti-establishment and the voice of the disenfranchised, right? Remember the Music Riots of 2043? There are a fuck-ton of musicians on Earth and the colonies ready to jump at the chance for a safe but public fuck-you to the Man.” A new plan unfolded in her mind. “Shit, you could open up the festivals to everyone and sell tickets to visitors. I was on Harmony a few weeks ago. That place is almost depressing as Chorus, and they didn’t even have a civil war! I bet they’d fork over money for some fun.”

A few of the council members looked uncertain, but one, Garcia, leaned forward. “If that’s true, we could use some of the abandoned apartments as temporary hotels. It might be a potential source of revenue.”

“Talking revenue, shit, do you know how many people would want to visit your weird alien temples? People are crazy about aliens. You’ve got your nerds and historians and _especially_ your alien freaks.” Kai grinned, winking at Kimball, who had unbent a little. “If you could talk to Santa, get that Temple of Procreation to act like a roofie on only people willing to pay for it, you--”

“No!” a half-dozen voices shouted. Kimball didn't shout, but her expression was a clear denial.

Kai swallowed down a giggle. It was too easy to mess with Chorusans about the Temple of Procreation. Everyone except Grey looked flustered, and she was pretty sure a few of them were blushing. “Just an idea,” she said, shrugging. “People are into weird shit. You could make mad money with a roofie temple.” She was still a little pissed that she hadn’t been on Chorus when the temple had been accidentally activated. It sounded like a good time.

“I like the idea of creating alternative revenue streams with music festivals and the temples as potential tourist attractions,” Garcia said. She glanced around the room. “Of course, as it stands, this is all theoretical. I vote that we table this idea until the blockade is lifted and we have a better idea of what, if any compensation we’re receiving from the UNSC and Charon Industries, and then vote on it again.”

“I second the motion,” Kimball said. “All in favor say aye.”

“Okay, tabling it,” Kai said cheerfully after the ayes had it, already making a mental list of which musicians would make a decent line-up for the first performance post-blockade. She grinned at the group. “Don’t forget, I’m throwing another rave. Councilman Perry, I want to see you shaking that ass Friday night.”

She started to leave amid laughter, and paused by Grey’s chair. She’d been here for ages now, and still hadn’t managed a date with Grey yet. The first time they’d been interrupted by a sudden outbreak of an antiviral-resistant cold. The second time the UNSC had demanded another meeting, and Grey and Kimball and the council had been busy for days. At least Niner was up for fun.

Kai leaned against the back of the chair, and began to fiddle with Grey’s hair bun, which had started to unravel halfway through the council meeting and was now at risk of collapsing entirely. Grey’s hair was smoother and thinner than Dexter’s, but twisting hair into a bun was still second-nature. As she worked on Grey’s hair, she said, “If you need a date for the rave, my offer’s always open.”

Grey hummed a little under her breath. Her neck was cool against Kai’s fingers as Kai caught a few stubborn strands. “Unfortunately I have the night shift on Friday. But I might be able to make it to Wednesday’s movie marathon. This week’s theme is horror, isn’t it?”

Kai grinned. “Fuck yeah. I’ll save you a seat.” She finished with the bun, and eyed it critically. Satisfied, she patted Grey’s arm and said, “Maybe you’ll get to that third date eventually.”

Grey giggled. “I hope so! I do so want to pick your brain and see what makes you and your brother tick.”

Kai was pretty sure the picking her brain remark was a metaphor. Even if it wasn’t, that was still sort of hot…and offered potential fun with anesthesia. She grinned. “See you Wednesday--”

Smith rushed into the room. His blank helmet managed to radiate urgency. The lighthearted mood of the room vanished, replaced by grim tension.

Kimball rose. “What is it, Lieutenant Smith?”

He saluted her awkwardly. “Sorry for the interruption, madam president. Dr. Grey! You have to come to the hospital now.”

Grey jumped up. She giggled even as she moved with brisk efficiency towards the door. “It’s so nice to be needed. What’s going on, lieutenant? Another outbreak?”

Smith hesitated. His helmet turned, and Kai realized that he was staring at her. “Um, this probably concerns Private Grif and the president. Agent Washington is in urgent care.” His voice wobbled. “He’s in really bad shape. Dr. Huang is keeping him stable, but we need you.”

“Oh dear. That does sound dire,” said Grey with no discernible change in tone.

Kimball said, “Council, you’re dismissed. I’ll keep you apprised of the situation.” All the earlier softness was gone. Her mouth was an unsmiling line, her gaze hard. “Lieutenant, was anyone with him?”

Smith spread his hands out in a helpless gesture. “That’s the thing, ma’am. Someone just dropped him at DD General with a note detailing his injuries. Nobody saw him come in.”  

Kai stared at Kimball, Grey, and Smith even as she followed them out the door and down the hallway. Kimball looked like someone had kicked her puppy. Grey looked her usual smiling self, but that meant nothing. She’d probably still be smiling if she was bleeding out. Smith walked quickly, like he wanted to run. Kai racked her brain, because the name Washington rang a vague bell.

After a second of struggle, she gave up and demanded, “Okay, who the fuck _is_ this guy?”

Surprise flickered in Kimball’s eyes, though her steps never slowed. “Agent Washington is your brother’s friend. He’s one of the Reds and Blues.”

“Dex’s friend?” Her brain hurt. She vaguely remembered a dry-voiced jerk that had bothered her and that ugly old sergeant back at Blood Gulch. “There was a cop looking for Big Bro and the others. I think he said his name was Washington.” She wrinkled her nose. “What the fuck is my brother doing, hanging out with _cops_?” She put as much disgust as possible into the last word.

“Um, Miss Kaikaina, you hang out with me and the other lieutenants all the time,” Smith offered tentatively. “We’re all police officers, remember? Well, except for Jensen working on her engineering degree.”

Kai scowled. Dex was going to make fun of her forever for accidentally befriending the entire police department. How had she been supposed to know all her weirdos had switched from careers from soldiers to cops? It had taken her a whole week to realize she’d surrounded herself with the Five-O, and by then they’d wormed their way into her affection, the little shits. “Ugh, don’t remind me. It was a really close call that I didn’t disown all your asses.” She turned to Kimball and Grey. “So, do you think this Washington guy knows where Big Bro is?”

“We’ll have to ask him if he survives,” Grey said cheerfully. She stalked through the doors of the hospital, unphased by the panicked tension in the air. A woman rushed up to her, wide-eyed, and said, “Dr. Huang just took him into the operating room, Dr. Grey!”

“Thank you, Nurse Berger. I hear Agent Washington got himself into quite the predicament! Shall we see if we can keep him alive?”

Kai watched Grey disappear down the hallway. Then she poked Smith in his shoulder, but gently because he was wearing his armor and she didn’t want to break her finger. She'd ditched her armor the day after she’d arrived on Chorus, since she was going for that fun professional vibe instead of a boring soldier one. Her armor was in her apartment, hopefully rusting. “Where’s the note? Was it hand-written? Did my brother write it? Can I see it?”

“Um, it’s….” Smith looked around. “Over there.”

The paper was crumpled and slightly bloodstained at the edges. Kai felt a stab of disappointment at the unfamiliar handwriting. Then she actually read the note, which listed all of Washington’s injuries. She whistled, impressed, and handed it to Kimball to read. “How is this dude still breathing?”

Kimball didn’t say anything, just looked grimmer. “Smith, I want access to the hospital’s security feed. Let’s see if we can discover who dropped Washington at our door. And we’re putting Chorus on yellow alert. This doesn’t feel like the UNSC, but I’m not taking any chances.”

“Yes, ma’am!” Smith said with a salute.

They went off, leaving Kai there. She thought about trying to help, but her color-blindness made her pretty useless watching grainy video. Besides, her thoughts had started to chase themselves in circles. Kimball had said she didn’t think it was the UNSC, but someone had worked Washington over, refusing him food and water for days before ending it with a bullet through his neck. Did those same people have Dex? Was he being tortured too?

She grabbed the arm of the nearest nurse and asked, “How long do surgeries usually take?”

The nurse looked apologetic. “It varies, Miss Kaikaina. But with the severity of Agent Washington’s injuries, we probably won’t know anything for hours yet.” She paused, and bit her lip. _If he doesn’t die, and then we won’t know anything at all_ was practically stamped on her face.

“Fucking shitballs,” Kai growled.

The nurse looked like she agreed. “There’s the surgery waiting room, if you wanted to stick around….”

Kai didn’t want to stay. She wanted to be with Dex, even if he was captured or in the middle of a fight. But she couldn’t repeat how she’d found him last time. She'd been in Basic for all of two months when the other recruits had started gossiping about a massacred colony -- Big Bro's colony, that he'd whined at her about in the single message she'd received after he'd left Basic. There'd been bullshit about her brother's status being MIA but nothing on if they were actively looking for him, the dickweasels, like it was too much to figure out if he was fucking alive. She'd finally screwed another recruit into hacking the UNSC files. That nerd had been wrapped around her finger after a few half-assed blowjobs, though it had taken a long, terrible month before they’d found out that her brother was alive and where he'd been transferred. She’d promptly stolen a Pelican and flown it straight to Blood Gulch, because fuck that shit.

Now she was stuck. The universe was a big place. Dexter could be in an entirely different quadrant and a week’s flight away. She didn’t have enough information to do anything useful, so she sat cross-legged on the waiting room couch, chewing on her hair and waiting to see if Agent Washington would survive.

She wondered if anyone would narc on her if she pulled out her flask. She’d just lifted it to her lips when the doors to the waiting room burst open and the other lieutenants rushed inside. The waiting room became crowded in a second.  

“Miss Kaikaina!” Matthews said breathlessly. “We came as soon as we heard. Agent Washington is in surgery?”

Kai hesitated, and then risked a swig. Thankfully all of them seemed too distracted to remember that they were cops. She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand and said, “Yeah, Grey’s working on him. And Smith and the prez are going over security footage, trying to figure out who dropped him off.”

“I’ll go help!” Matthews said, but the rest stayed as he disappeared back through the doors. Bitters leaned against the nearest wall, his arms folded against his chest. Palomo began pacing around the room. Weber, Adebowale, and Nováková sat down in the nearby chairs, all looking worried.

Katie sat next to Kai and smiled anxiously. “I’m sure Agent Washington will be okay!” she said, with a glaring lack of surety to her voice. “Dr. Grey is the best surgeon on Chorus. Did he say anything?”

“Jensen, you heard Smith. Washington got shot in the neck. He probably can’t talk,” Bitters said. There wasn’t any bite to his words. He stared at the lit “surgery in progress” sign like he thought Grey would come out with bad news any second.

“I know, but….” Katie’s voice wobbled. She stopped, biting her lip. “Do you think--” She stopped again. Her voice got squeakier, her eyes brighter. “Do you think he’ll….?”

“He’ll be okay,” Palomo said confidently. He paused in his pacing long enough to touch Katie’s shoulder and smile at her. “Dr. Grey will patch him up, and then he’ll tell us if Captain Tucker and everyone need help, and we’ll be their backup.”

“Or he’ll die, and we won’t know shit, and the UNSC will invade,” Bitters said grimly.

“They can _try_ ,” Adebowale snapped. “This is our home. We know the terrain. We’ve got an advantage.”

Bitters snorted. “Advantage? What advantage? This isn’t Hargrove throwing mercenaries at us and trying to get us to kill each other so he can steal the alien tech or whatever. The UNSC will just drop a couple bombs on Chorus and move on to their next problem.”

“Fuck your pessimism, Bitters,” Weber said. “The UNSC can’t do that when we haven’t done anything.”

Bitters didn’t look at her. He was still staring at the surgery sign. His voice was flat when he said, “You think they wouldn’t make up evidence if it suited them? Or just drop the nukes and go ‘Oh, whoops? Sorry about that bad intel!’ in a few months?”

There was an ugly tension in the room. Nováková was chewing on her nails. Adebowale looked ready to jump up and fight someone, probably Bitters. Weber had one fist clenched like she’d join in if Adebowale jumped him. Palomo was pacing again, and Katie had begun to fidget, her elbow bumping against Kai’s arm.  

Kai stood up. She didn’t make a conscious decision about it, but one second she was cross-legged on the couch and the next she was standing with everyone’s eyes fixed on her. Even Palomo had frozen in place. “The nurse said it could be hours before we heard anything,” she said. “So fuck it. Let’s go to the Hye Bar and drink to Washington’s health and all that shit. I’ll get someone to let us know when anything changes.”

“I’m on duty,” Palomo said.

Kai shrugged. “Then be our fucking designated walker or something and help us cross the street. Fuck, man, I don’t know.” She glanced around and grimaced. “I’d just rather get shit-faced than sit around here.”

Nováková actually smiled. “Honestly? Same. If we do get bombed into oblivion, I'd like to die shit-faced and giving the UNSC the finger.”

Kai tossed her flask at Nováková. “You heard her. Let’s get going, sluts.”

 

* * *

 

Five glasses in, and Kai still wasn't drunk enough. Her thoughts kept chasing themselves in circles like a dumb dog trying to catch its tail. Every time someone came through the bar’s front door, she tensed, sure that it was a nurse there to tell her that either Washington was dead or that Bitters had been right and they were all fucked.

“Palomo, you might be on duty, but don’t be a narc, okay?” she said, and pulled out her stash of Chorusan weed that she'd rolled into thin cigarettes. It had taken her a few days to track down the city’s dealers, but it turned out Chorus had a plant similar to marijuana. It wasn’t too popular because of its weird copper aftertaste, its short-lasting effects, and the way it turned your brain to mush, but right now it would do the trick.

“I don’t see anything, ma’am,” Palomo said, staring up at the ceiling.

Kai decided to let the ma’am thing slide. She blew out a ring of smoke that Niner claimed was an eye-watering purple, and watched it float over Weber’s head.

And speak of the devil herself, because the front door opened again and Niner walked in. She dropped onto the seat next to Kai and snapped at the bartender, “Two glasses of whisky if you’ve got it. Moonshine if you don’t.”

“Want a hit?” Kai asked, and blinked when Niner snatched the cigarette out of her hand.

Upon closer inspection, Niner looked as upset about the Washington news as the lieutenants and Kimball. She inhaled, but she didn’t relax after a few puffs. If anything, she looked antsier. She grimaced and took a long swallow from one of her whiskeys. “You might’ve warned me it was Chorusan weed. That aftertaste is nasty. Got anything else?”

Kai looked sideways at Palomo, who was now humming loudly as he studied the ceiling. Katie leaned against him, half asleep from the moonshine. Everyone else was distracted with their drinks or low, anxious conversations about Washington and the UNSC. “Just some ecstasy, but I wouldn’t take it after smoking Chorusan shit. Well, _I_ would, but you probably wouldn’t want that kind of trip. It’s all apocalyptic bullshit and paranoia.” She hesitated, watching Niner drink like she was dying of thirst. Was Niner panicking that the UNSC might actually invade? Maybe she had done enough shit that she had a wanted poster and a bounty on her head. That would be hot. “Uh, you want to talk about it?”

“No,” Niner said, and then sighed. “Yes. Give me a second.” She signaled the bartender for a third whisky. When it came, she downed it in one go and then stood. Apparently she didn’t want to sit here and talk.

Kai finished off the cigarette, because she was pretty sure Palomo would throw it away if she left it in the ashtray. Then she got up and followed.

In the alley, Niner stopped. She stood very still for a moment, her head bowed. One hand reached up and rubbed absently where Kai knew the tattoo was inked upon her skin. The other was clenched into a fist at her side. “I’ve been flying odd jobs for the last few years,” she said, not looking at Kai.

Kai blinked, wondering if the mix of moonshine and weed had made her lose track of the conversation. Over the last few weeks Niner had helped her with the raves and movie nights, and become reluctantly attached to their weird kids. She'd started teaching Katie how to drive and Bitters how to fly the Pelican, shit like that, and was even helping with some of the rebuilding. Through it all she’d kept her mouth shut about her past. Kai had asked about the tattoo one night, hoping the afterglow would loosen her tongue, but Niner had just gone stony-faced. Kai had let it drop.

Now Niner went on, her voice wry and remote. “The UNSC and I didn’t part on good terms, so I’ve been keeping my head down. Taking all the shitty, dangerous jobs you do because you can’t do the fun, dangerous jobs you used to. These last few, I was smuggling some real illegal stuff, so I went dark for a while. I heard about Chorus afterwards, how a dickhead tried to murder an entire planet for their alien tech, and that some rogue UNSC soldiers stopped him. Rogue UNSC soldiers. That’s funny.” A laugh escaped her, but there wasn’t any humor in the sound.

“Yeah?” Kai said, when Niner didn’t say anything else. “Big Bro and his friends.”

“Your brother has interesting friends. When did he start hanging around with Freelancers?”

Kai frowned. “Freelancers?” It rang another vague bell. Hadn’t Washington said something about Freelancers when he’d come to Blood Gulch? She’d been so high, the memory was blurry and indistinct, mostly just a frustrated voice lying his ass off about not being a cop and whining about her insanity.

Niner turned then. Her expression was so harsh that Kai would’ve flinched if the moonshine and weed hadn’t made her reaction time nonexistent. Her voice was low and rough. “Washington is here and probably dying. Carolina’s alive, but she might be in trouble. And I’ve been bumming around the universe when I could’ve--” She stopped and drew in a ragged breath. She rubbed her hands over her face and said, the words not quite muffled enough to hide the thickness in her voice, “I thought they were dead. I thought they were all dead or in prison and I just…. _Shit_.”

Kai was lost. She pretty sure she couldn’t entirely blame the alcohol and drugs, though her mind did feel like mush, all her emotions dialed down from ten to about a two or three. Still, she recognized helpless anger when she saw it echoed in someone else. Whoever this Carolina was, Niner wanted to help them like Kai wanted to help Dex.

Niner twitched when Kai touched her arm, but didn’t pull away. Kai licked her lips, copper thick on her tongue, and tried to untangle her muddled thoughts. Earnestly, she said, “Niner, Dex’s friends are like impossible to kill. I crashed a ship on one, and he survived! And he was pretty chill about it, too. Plus Dex tries to pretend he doesn’t care, but he’s a total softie. One time when we were kids and still traveling with the circus, we were somewhere cold. Nebraska maybe, or Canada. I fell through the ice when we were skating. Dex tried to jump in after me. If this Carolina is with Big Bro, he’s got her back. Okay?”

Niner didn’t relax completely, but she'd unwound enough that she wasn't rubbing at her face. Her expression had gotten less terrifying, too. “Okay,” she said. “Fair warning. I’m not very good at waiting.”

“Waiting sucks hardcore,” Kai agreed, and pulled out her second flask. “But that’s what my emergency flask is for. Vodka?”

"Yes, please," Niner said. Her shoulders loosened as she drained half the flask with a cough and a wince. When she passed it back, she was smiling faintly. "Is vodka another word for gasoline where you come from? I think all my taste buds are dead."

Kai finished off the vodka and then sidled forward, a plan half-forming in her brain. Niner watched her approach, raising an amused eyebrow as Kai pressed in close. Niner was wearing a tank top again. It was easy to slide her hands under the fabric and touch warm skin. "A good fuck is a pretty sweet distraction too," she offered with a grin.

"Is it?" Niner said, smiling back. "I've heard that around."

Kai kissed her, pushing aside drug-distant worries and helplessness in favor of the warm reality of Niner's breast in her palm. Niner groaned against her mouth as Kai rubbed a thumb over her nipple. Yeah, Kai was never wrong when it came to the right time for sex. It was like a seventh sense or something.

She pinched Niner's nipple, getting another groan out of her, and asked, "Hey, bitch. You gonna distract me back or what?" She was still grinning when Niner dropped to her knees and said, "That's the plan."

 

* * *

 

"Miss Kaikaina! Miss Kaikaina!"

Kai had just caught her breath when people began yelling her name. It sounded like Matthews and Smith. The weed buzz was wearing off; her good mood disappeared and she felt a spike of fear like a punch to her belly. For a second her throat was too tight to answer. She glanced at Niner, who looked tense again.

"Miss Kaikaina!"

Kai took a deep breath and yelled, "Call yourselves fucking cops? I'm right here, dumbasses!"

Matthews and Smith appeared at the alley's entrance. Smith looked embarrassed as he realized what they'd almost interrupted, his eyes darting between Kai and Niner, but Matthews seemed oblivious. "Miss Kaikaina, there's another message!"

Kai blinked. "Another message?"

Smith cleared his throat as the rest of the lieutenants stumbled around the corner, most looking a little worse for wear. Smith raised his voice so that everyone could hear. "The person who dropped off Agent Washington must have had cloaking technology, because we couldn't see anything. But then Matthews thought to watch for the note left behind. Something else had appeared at the same time on the desk. It must've been knocked to the ground during all the chaos, and no one--"

"What the fuck did it say?" Kai demanded impatiently. "Is Big Bro okay?"

Wordlessly, Matthews dropped a small device at their feet. A second later, two tiny armored holograms sprang out of it. Kai's eyes fixed on the one that looked familiar in a gray, glowing way. Or maybe that was just wishful thinking. That hologram was standing close to the other, one hand out like it didn't think the other was that steady on their feet. She was frustrated by her color-blindness again. If she could see, she'd know instantly if it was her brother, right? Tucker had told her that his armor was a bright orange. Hope fluttered in her chest. 

"This is Agent Carolina," the other hologram said. She sounded tired but determined. From the way Niner sucked in a breath, her expression shuttering, Kai would've known who the woman was even if she hadn't introduced herself. "We're on our way to try and stop an attack on Earth by the men pretending to be the Reds and Blues. We'd appreciate assistance. We're down a man, and I'm not in decent shape myself. Here are the coordinates." She rattled off a series of numbers that Kai immediately forgot. Hopefully one of the lieutenants was good with numbers.

Her heart stopped, and then started again, too fast and loud in her ears, as the second hologram said with her brother's sarcastic, wonderful voice, "That's putting it mildly. Look, guys, we're about to either save the UNSC headquarters or die horrible deaths. I mean, hopefully we'll stop this Temple guy and shit, but if we don't, try to get the word out, would you? Being in the history books as murderous assholes would totally suck. I don’t want my face side by side by like, I don’t know, fucking--"

"Grif," Carolina said, and her brother's rambling stopped with a muttered apology. Carolina's helmet tilted, like she was trying to look at the listeners. "We could use some back-up, or at least a ride after all this. We also have some evidence I think will help Chorus with its negotiations." She paused. Her voice softened. "Thank you for everything you're doing for Wash. I know you’ll give him the best possible care. See you soon."

The holograms flickered and then vanished. The lieutenants all began to talk, half-shouting over each other to be heard.

Kai took a deep breath. The weed buzz was definitely gone. It was hard to think around the mix of relief and fear. Big Bro had seemed okay, but he was also going off to fight some seriously bad guys. "I'll go get my armor," she said, ignoring all the talking. She nodded at Niner. "Think the Pelican will be able to slip through the blockade again?"

"As long as I’m flying, they’ll never see us."  
  
"Um, Miss Kaikaina, President Kimball said she thought you might insist on coming with us." As Kai bristled, ready to throw down if anyone suggested she shouldn't come, Matthews added hastily, "She also said we shouldn’t argue. That Pelican will probably get us there faster anyway."

“Fuck yeah it will! Come on, sluts. Big Bro and his friends need us.”

Niner eyed the group. Most of the lieutenants looked worse for wear after all that alcohol. Katie leaned heavily against Palomo, and Weber was half-slumped against the wall, grimacing every time someone spoke. “The first person to puke has to buy a round of drinks when we get back,” she said.

“Oh, don’t mention puke,” Katie said weakly, and Niner grinned.

“Sorry, kid.”

Kai looked up. It was a cloudless day, but beyond the blue sky and the invisible stars Dexter and his friends were chasing bad guys towards Earth and trying to be heroes again. And this time she might actually get to help. At the very least, she'd get to see her brother again. She ran past everyone, heading for her apartment. Hopefully her armor hadn’t actually rusted.

“Come on, bitches, let’s go!”

 

* * *

 

When they were within range of Earth, Niner relented and let them listen in on the world news. Solemn-faced reporters announced that the UNSC would hold a press conference the next day regarding the recent attacks on UNSC bases and the ongoing negotiations with Chorus.

“That’s a good sign, right?” Katie asked hopefully. "That means they haven't done anything yet. We still have time to get them evidence!" 

Kai wanted to be optimistic, but she’d gone full pessimist the minute she realized she hadn’t brought any alcohol with her for the trip. The Chorusan weed had been vetoed because one or two losers didn't want a fucking contact high. She'd been sober for what felt like forever. It was weird. She fidgeted in her seat as Niner steered the Pelican towards the surface.

"There they are!" Katie said, peering through the glass and ignoring Niner's warning look. They'd all learned pretty quickly that Niner didn't appreciate backseat drivers or people invading her personal space. Just like they'd all figured out that first night on the ship that Katie's braces made her whistle in her sleep. "Look, guys! I think everyone's okay!"

"Remember the invisible line?" Niner said before anyone could rush to the window. "We all like the invisible line." The Pelican landed lightly. The back of the Pelican opened, and Kai blinked against the sunlight before her visor compensated for the brightness. "Now go say hello."

The lieutenants didn't need any other encouragement. They raced outside. Kai fumbled with her seat buckle, her hands suddenly clumsy. Katie had said everyone seemed okay, but she could've been wrong. Maybe Dex was hurt. Maybe he was--

She heard Smith ask, "Did anyone call for back-up?" She'd finally gotten herself unbuckled as Palomo chimed in with a joke and Tucker's familiar voice teased back. Something in her relaxed at the easy way Tucker answered them, because Tucker wouldn't sound like that if anyone was dead.

Then an even familiar voice said, "Just in time to clean up another one of our messes!" and Kai started running.

"Big Bro? Is that you?" She bolted down the ramp. And there was her brother, standing with his friends, his helmet tilted towards her, alive. Her breath caught in her throat. "Dex?!"

"Oh, hell," Dex groaned. "What are _you_ doing here?"

Kai wanted to laugh or punch him or both for trying to pretend he wasn't happy to see her. She looked him over, but he didn't seem injured. "I was on Chorus for business when these weirdos got your call. They let me tag along!"

"Business?" Dexter sounded vaguely horrified. "Oh God, do I need to confiscate your webcams again?"

Kai rolled her eyes. Was he still not over that little internet business she'd run? Who knew dudes got hot over weird shit like watching her cook barefoot? That had been like forever ago, though. Dexter really needed to let things go. "Bitch, shut up and hug me." She threw her arms around him and clung to him. After a second, he hugged her back. It was a good hug. She rested her head against his chest for a second, knowing she couldn't hear his heartbeat through the armor, but pretending she could anyway. She was glad that she hadn't taken off her helmet, because her eyes were watering and she was almost crying like a bitch.

"Oh!" Katie said brightly. "You’ll be happy to know Dr. Grey has Washington alive and recovering!"

A voice that Kai remembered from her brother's hologram message breathed, "Oh, that’s music." It was a nice voice, now that she sounded relieved and less tired. Her exclamation was followed by Tucker's fervent, "Oh, thank Christ!"

There was some more talking, but Kai had reluctantly let go of Dexter. She looked around at the group, scoping things out. Everyone really did seem okay, although she didn't see that hot robot guy that had choked her out that one time. That hot reporter chick and her cameraman guy were there though. Maybe Kai had one more chance for some fun with her.

Her wandering attention was caught by Kimball's name as Smith said, "... _questions_ about his delivery to Chorus. Apparently no one at DD General can figure out how he ended up at the hospital in the first place."

Dex's bestie, Simmons, coughed and muttered, "That’s, uh, a long story— Uh, maybe don’t worry her with it right now." He sounded sketchy as fuck, and also needed some lessons on how to lie convincingly if he was going to be stuck flying back to Chorus with a bunch of cops around him.

The hot reporter added warmly, "But I have a feeling her relationship with the UNSC will get a little easier after we file the final story."

And then there was more talking. God, Kai had forgotten how much bullshit everyone had to say. Between the lieutenants and Dex's friends, they'd be talking for _hours_. Then she frowned and looked around, just in case she'd missed her. There was no sign of Niner. What the fuck was that about? She remembered the unhappiness in Niner's voice as she'd talked about Washington and Carolina, her expression as she'd watched the holo message asking for help. Even Dex talking about eating a horse and random mention about chucking volleyballs into a volcano couldn't distract her.

She marched towards the Pelican and hollered, "Hey, bitch, quit being a pussy and get out here! Don't make me go in there and get you!"

"Kai, what the fuck are you talking about?" Dex asked.

There was a long moment, and then Niner appeared at the top of the ramp. She had her helmet under one arm and a tight smile on her face. Her gaze passed over Kai without seeing her, which she didn't take offense to, since she'd just done the same for Dexter, and settled on that Carolina chick.

"Niner?" Carolina sounded like she'd just had the wind knocked out of her. She took one step forward, stumbling a little, and both Tucker and Dex turned like they were ready to catch her if she fell over. Kai remembered the hologram's dry voice admitting she wasn't in the best shape, and wondered about Carolina's injuries. Nobody was yelling for a medic though, so she guessed they weren't that serious. Carolina took another step. "What are-- what are you doing here?"

Niner walked slowly down the ramp. "Do you want the long version or the short version?"

"I...."

The two women were staring at each other so intensely that Kai thought it was a crime that some romantic movie music wasn't playing in the background. She wondered if she could use the speakers in her helmet somehow and blast some slow jazz and shit. It'd be amazing. Then they didn't move. They just kept staring, like seeing each other had broken their brains. Were they just going to look at each other? Finally Kai couldn't take it any longer.

"Hug it out, sluts! Like, what the fuck kind of lame-ass reunion is this?"

Niner's smile widened. She jerked a thumb towards Kai. "She's the short version," she said dryly. "One day I'm minding my own business, and the next second this crazy chick offers me five hundred dollars to smuggle her to Chorus."

"You did _what_?" Dexter yelped.

Kai rolled her eyes. "Whatever. Colonel Fuckface and the UNSC wouldn't let me go to Chorus, and I needed to see if you were there, dumbass." She folded her arms against her chest. "Niner, I meant it. Hug this bitch, or you and I will have words."

Niner laughed and tossed her helmet to the ground. "Who can resist an order like that?"

"Aw, I can't decide if it's hot or sweet," Kai said as the two women finally hugged. "Leaning towards hot, though." She watched for a minute, and then mused, "Think they'd be up for a threesome?"

Dexter made a disgusted sound. He grabbed her shoulders and forced her to look at him. It would've probably worked better if his helmet was off, but instead she just stared unimpressed at his visor as he growled, "Kai. You already slept with Tucker. You _cannot_ sleep with any more of my friends."

"Aw, I knew we were friends." Tucker had a grin in his voice. "Hey, Kai."

"Hey, pencil-dick," she said cheerfully, and laughed when he sighed. Then she turned to Dex. "Big Bro, how many times have you told me not to fuck someone?"

"Uh, a lot, because you have the worst taste in people," Dex said flatly. They both ignored Tucker's protest of "Hey! Rude, much?"

"And how many times did I listen to you?"

"Uh, never." Dexter groaned. " _Fuck_."

"Exactly. Challenge accepted," Kai said with satisfaction, watching her brother slump in defeat. He really should've known better than to even try. She turned to watch the two women. They were no longer hugging, but Carolina had one arm slung across Niner's shoulders, and they were talking together, voices low and earnest. Niner was smiling. Carolina hadn't taken her helmet off yet, though, which was disappointing. "Man, I hope she's hot."

"Oh, she is," Tucker assured her. They high-fived as Dexter groaned again, even louder.

Kai brightened. "Awesome!" She sidled back over to Dex and nudged him. "So, you said something about volleyballs and a volcano. Can I help?"

He hesitated, and then shrugged. "Sure." He looked at her. "...You really paid five hundred dollars to get to Chorus?"

"Uh, yes. I thought you might be there after you guys were big heroes or whatever there. And hey, it sort of got me to you, so that five hundred paid off."

"You're an idiot," he informed her.

She nudged him again, making sure to use her elbow this time. He grunted in surprise. "Yeah, well, I wouldn't have had to drop five C-notes if _someone_ had told me where the fuck he was. I'm not letting you out of my sight again, dummy."

"Okay," he said.

She squinted at him. She'd expected some fake protests about not wanting her around that they both knew he didn't really mean. She didn't know what to make of the way he answered her, quiet and strange. She frowned at him. "What's up?"

"Uh, I just... It's a long story," he said with a weird laugh. "And I'm kind of talked out right now. I'd rather just drop some volleyballs in a volcano."

Kai stared at him for another second, and then decided to let it pass. She'd bug him later. For now she took off her helmet so he could see her wide grin. "Fuck yeah. Let's go destroy some shit."


	3. Chapter Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anticipation warmed Kai like she’d just downed a couple shots of tequila. She licked her lips. Tucker better not have lied to her about Carolina’s hotness levels. She leaned around Dexter to get a good look, ignoring his disgusted groan. 
> 
> The helmet came off with a quiet click.
> 
> Holy fuck. Kai owed Tucker another fist bump. Carolina was _hot_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now we finally get to the anon's request which involved Kai wanting to join Grif's band. And some Kai/Carolina sex. 
> 
> Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoy the final chapter!
> 
>  **Content warning for the chapter:** Some drug withdrawal and rough sex.

It turned out that sobriety fucking sucked. Kai felt like she was going to twitch right out of her skin. She felt too alert, like all of her senses were working over-time. She hadn’t noticed during her original flight to Chorus, but the recycled air tasted strange when she breathed. Or maybe that was just her brain screwing with her. There wasn’t even anything to distract her, once Dex and his friends had explained what had happened and how they’d saved Earth. Though Dex was being vague on the details of why he'd been separated from his friends. Kai was going to get the truth out of him sooner or later. 

She paced the crowded Pelican, stepping over people’s outstretched feet and avoiding the corner where Carolina was either sleeping or in a coma. Apparently being 'not in the best shape' was ex-Freelancer code for getting the same dehydration and starvation treatment as Washington and powering through it like a badass, crazy bitch. Carolina had made it onto the ship and then pretty much fallen over. Supposedly she’d woken up a few times to drink water and nibble on protein bars, but Kai had missed her taking off her helmet every time. She was going to have to have a fucking fight with the universe if she didn’t see Carolina’s face soon.   

Kai sidestepped Matthews and Simmons, who were being earnest over some lame nerd talk. She eyed Niner, but she was pretty sure that the other woman was about one ‘Are we almost there yet?’ away from straight up gagging her. The idea would’ve been kinky and fun if Dex hadn’t been around. She wiped sweat from her forehead and groaned. “I thought Chorus was like moonshine planet. How the fuck does no one here have alcohol?”

Bitters and Katie exchanged a look. “Well,” Katie said apologetically, “I _could_ probably make a still. We don’t have the right ingredients, though, so it’s a moot point.”

“You don’t have the right parts either, if you were thinking of using anything from the Pelican,” Niner said. She turned a little in her seat. Her helmet was on, but Kai was pretty sure that her eyes were narrowed, her smile dangerous. “No one’s touching my ship.”

“Bitch, it’s _my_ ship,” Kai reminded her, ignoring the fact that the Pelican belonged to the UNSC. Probably. Then again, they’d never ordered her to give it back after she’d stolen it, so maybe it was hers now. When Niner just turned back to the controls, Kai threw herself into the empty seat next to Dex.

He made a half-assed attempt at shoving her away when she flopped against his shoulder, then sighed and wrapped his arm around her. “Hey, dummy.”

It was a heavy weight, but she didn’t mind, even if it was weird that everyone kept wearing their helmets. She got the armor thing since she was pretty sure no one had spare clothes, but it’d be nice to see some faces. She frowned up at him. “Bro, I can’t believe you had space meth and didn’t save any for me. I am _so_ disappointed in you.”

“Sorry,” Dex said, not sounding sorry at all. Across from them, Donut made a disapproving sound. Her brother snorted and added, tone flat but slightly mocking, “Yeah, yeah, Donut, we know. Don’t do drugs.”

“I’m just saying, your sister is a perfect example of why drugs are bad,” Donut said primly, gesturing at her. “Withdrawal isn’t a good look on anyone.”

Kai growled and gave him the finger. She’d gotten desperate enough to try and smoke the last of her weed in the bathroom, except that fucker had wrestled it from her and flushed it into space. Only Dex and Tucker holding her back had kept her from beating his ass to a pulp. She still itched to do it. “I’m gonna spike your shit the next time you do a wine and cheese hour.”

Donut gasped. “Irritability is a sign of withdrawal, but that’s a bit much!”

“If you don’t--” Kai broke off as Carolina stirred. She grinned, putting aside her plans for revenge against Donut. It could wait. “Hey, badass Sleeping Beauty’s awake!”

Tucker laughed. “Badass Sleeping Beauty. Wash is gonna love that.”

“Status report?” Carolina said, sounding pretty alert for someone who’d been awake for a whole ten seconds. She sat up slowly, propping herself against the wall. Sarge rolled a water bottle towards her. “Thanks.”   

Niner shrugged. “Depends on if that reporter aired her story yet. If she hasn’t, I’ll have to do some fancy flying to slide past the blockade. I estimate about six hours.” She glanced over her shoulder. “How are you feeling?”

“Better,” Carolina said. “Though I wouldn’t object to a decent meal when we’re back on Chorus. Or an IV.” Her hands went to the clasps of her helmet.

Anticipation warmed Kai like she’d just downed a couple shots of tequila. She licked her lips. Tucker better not have lied to her about Carolina’s hotness levels. She leaned around Dexter to get a good look, ignoring his disgusted groan.

The helmet came off with a quiet click.

Holy fuck. Kai owed Tucker another fist bump. Carolina was _hot_. Sure she had a bit of helmet hair, but it was the kind of helmet hair that promised to be soft and silky when clean, the kind of hair Kai loved to run her hands through. She had a strong, gorgeous face. Kai looked at her mouth, those full lips, and wanted to kiss her, probably would’ve wanted her even if Dexter hadn’t told her not to.

She couldn’t help herself; she wolf-whistled, loud enough that nearly everyone jumped and Sarge made an aborted grab for his shotgun.

Carolina just lowered the water bottle and glanced over, her expression unreadable but not unfriendly.

Kai decided that was a promising start. “Hi, beautiful,” she said, smiling. “I’m Kaikaina. Wanna be my plus one for the Chorus music festival?”

“Not the most original pick-up line I’ve ever heard,” Carolina said. She had a nice voice too, despite the obvious sarcasm coloring it. She tilted her head, her eyes focused on Kai. Kai bet they were a pretty shade. She sounded genuinely curious when she asked, “Does it usually work for you?”

“You should’ve heard her pick-up line for me,” Niner said dryly.

Kai grinned. “Hey, it worked, didn’t it?” Carolina’s eyebrows went up, surprise widening her eyes. Kai wondered if she’d misjudged Carolina and Niner’s relationship even as the surprise shifted to mild amusement. She’d always been optimistic about hot ladies though, so she pressed on. “The music festival invite is a first, but yeah, usually suggesting drinks works. I mean, hello?” Kai waved a hand at herself. She was still wearing the clothing she’d worn for her meeting with Kimball and the council. It was a little grungy at the moment, since Dex had almost stroked out when she’d tried to strip and toss her clothes into the laundry, but the top showed off her chest. Who wouldn’t want a piece of her?

“A music festival?” Palomo repeated. He sounded excited, but confused. “Is that like a rave?”

Kai blinked, caught off guard. It wasn’t that she forgot about Chorus’ civil war, but every once in a while one of the kids would drop something shocking like not knowing what a music festival was and take her by surprise.

“Not really,” Bitters said before Kai could explain. “It’s mostly a couple bands performing for an audience. My dad took me to a kids version before the war. Though, uh, Chorus doesn’t exactly have a lot of musicians anymore.” He crossed and uncrossed his arms, and then added, a bitter edge souring his attempt at humor, “Matthews can play the harmonica, but I don’t think that’s what you’re going for.”  

Kai laughed, going along with the joke as Matthews muttered that harmonicas were unappreciated instruments. “Yeah, usually we’d have bands, but I was thinking of karaoke on steroids for the first one. Me just blasting my music, putting the lyrics up on a screen or something, and letting people sing along and party.”

“That sounds fun!” Caboose said. He’d been weirdly quiet most of the trip, but Tucker had told her that he was okay, just a little sad about Church, who they’d thought might actually be alive or something but was definitely dead. Honestly, Kai didn’t understand what the fuck went on with Grif’s friends sometimes. People died, came back, were ghosts or AIs or some weird shit. She didn’t really care, except she didn’t like seeing Caboose sad. “I bet we could help with our band! Grif, did you tell her about our band?”

Some of his usual cheerfulness had finally returned to his voice. Kai smiled to hear it. Then his words actually registered. She momentarily forgot about seducing the shit out of Carolina. Big Bro had a _band_? She struggled to picture it. What the fuck did he even play? Slowly, she turned to look at Dex, who had slumped against the wall. His hands covered his visor. “What. The. Fuck. When did you start a fucking band? Are you any good? Can I listen? What’s your band called? Can I join?”

“ _Fuck,_ ” Dex said with feeling. “Thanks for blabbing, Caboose.” The complaint didn’t have any heat to it, and Caboose said brightly, “You’re welcome, Grif!” Dex grunted when Kai elbowed his side, even though it probably hurt her elbow more than him. “Jesus. We started the band when we were retired. We sound okay, I guess. Sure you can listen, whatever. We don’t have a band name because Tucker keeps suggesting stupid shit--”

“Uh, screw you, The Blue Fighters is a great name,” Tucker said. “ _Your_ ideas suck.”

“--and finally, fuck no, you can’t join.”  

Kai didn’t believe him on the last one. There was no way she wasn’t joining his band, or at the very least becoming his manager. She bounced upright, even more excited than before. She couldn’t wait to see Kimball and the other council members’ faces when she told them Grif and his friends were headlining the festival. “What genre? Fuck, it doesn’t matter. Who’s in the band? What instruments do you guys play?”

To her surprise, it was Carolina who answered as Dex just groaned some more. “Grif and Tucker play guitar, Caboose is on the drums, and I sing. We’re...eclectic in genre.”

“Eclectic, right. And Carolina is a totally awesome singer,” Tucker said. Weirdly, he sounded a little sarcastic. “You won’t believe your ears when you hear us.”

Kai pictured Carolina singing, her mouth almost caressing the mic, her body swaying with the music. She swallowed, a little distracted. She cleared her throat. “Sweet. Okay, one last question.” She paused, staring at Dex, Tucker, Caboose, and Carolina individually, though she lingered on Carolina. “Are you guys ready to fucking rock Chorus’s world?”   

“Oh,” Simmons said, and laughed nervously. “I, uh, don’t know if the band is really ready for an audience yet.”  

Kai rolled her eyes. “Shut up, bitch, you’re not even in it.”

Simmons bristled, folding his arms against his chest. “Well, excuse me! I just think that it’s a _little_ early for performances when they don’t even have a name. And I still feel that my banjo would be an interesting addition to--”

“No,” Dex said flatly, and Simmons sighed. Then Dex snickered. “But hey, Simmons, maybe you could work something out with Matthews. A harmonica and a banjo? Call yourselves the Nerdy Duo and you’re fucking set.”

“Thanks,” Simmons said sarcastically. “I’ll be sure to dedicate our first song to you.”

“Aw, I’m touched.”

As the two kept bickering, Matthews clutched Bitters’ arm and said in a carrying whisper, “Oh god, they’re just kidding right? I can’t perform in front of crowds, but if Captain Simmons asks, I can’t say no! I just, oh god--”

“Yeah, you’re probably fucked,” Bitters said cheerfully, and then patted Matthews as the other man slumped.

Kai sidled over to where Carolina sat, and dropped down next to her. She grinned as Carolina raised her eyebrows. “I have a few questions.”

“Let me guess,” Niner called over her shoulder. She was definitely grinning like a little shit. “Does she like ladies?”

Kai made a face in her direction. “Again, it fucking worked, so shut your mouth.” Niner only laughed. Kai turned back to Carolina, ignoring Tucker reaching out for a fist bump. “So...do you like ladies? Did you and Niner ever have a thing? Are you still a thing? I’m just saying, I’m totally into three-ways, if that’s on the table.”   

Carolina stared at her for a moment. Then she turned towards Niner. “Is she for real?”

Niner laughed. “I think she’s the realest person I’ve ever met. It’s pretty refreshing.”

Carolina’s face went unreadable again, which Kai couldn’t tell was a good thing or not. Was she thinking it over, or figuring out a polite way to tell Kai to fuck off? Kai slid one hand behind her back and crossed her fingers to hope for the former.

“Uh, not that I’m objecting,” said Tucker, “because fuck, I am definitely not, this conversation is fucking amazing, but where’s the invite for a threesome for me, Kai? I thought we were friends!”

He sounded like he was joking, but just in case she had hurt his feelings, she patted his leg and explained, “Sorry, Tucker. It’s not you. I’m just in a bi phase now.”

Tucker didn’t have his helmet off, but she could sense his frown. “Okay? That sounds like a good time for a threesome to me.”

How did he not get this? She repeated herself, a little slower. “Yeah, but not with you. I’m in a _bi phase_.”

“Oh, Jesus,” Grif groaned. “I had honestly forgotten how fucking stupid you are. Kai, please explain what a bi phase is to Tucker so we can put this bullshit behind us and never mention it again.”

Kai sighed heavily. “Fine. A bi phase is when you’re into chicks instead of dudes.”

“What?” Tucker laughed. “No, being bi means you like guys _and_ girls.”

“Yeah, but not at the _same time_ ,” Kai said. She looked around, expecting someone to back her up, but everyone was staring. She huffed. “Uh, you can’t like guys _and_ girls at the same time! That’s too many fucking options. How the fuck would you get anything done? Or choose anyone to do, if you know what I mean.” She waited for Tucker to chime in with his usual bow chicka wow wow, but he didn’t say a word, just stared at her. She shrugged. “So yeah, right now I’m all about the ladies.” She gave Tucker a sympathetic smile and another pat on the knee. “Maybe in a month I’ll be into dudes again. I’ll let you know.”

There was a long silence. Then Palomo whispered softly, almost to himself, “That's not how it works, right? Right.”

Bitters snorted. “God, Palomo, seriously?”

Carolina chuckled. It was a soft sound, so low that Kai almost didn’t hear it. Kai liked the sound of it though, how it was rough around the edges, as though she didn’t laugh that often. She wondered if she could get Carolina to laugh in bed. She’d definitely try if she got the chance.

Carolina cleared her throat. There was a slight smile at the corner of her mouth. “That is...certainly a unique way of looking at things.”

“No, it’s stupid, because Kai is the dumbest person alive,” Dex said, sighing. He paused, his helmet tilting a little towards Caboose, and muttered, “Make that the second dumbest.” He leaned forward in his seat, clasping his hands together like he was praying. God, she had the most ridiculous brother ever. “Carolina. Padawan. Please turn Kai down. Tucker was bad enough. I cannot take one more person here seeing Kai naked.”

“Dude,” Tucker scolded. “Don’t cockblock your sister.”

Kai rolled her eyes and grinned. “Yeah, Big Bro. You don’t see me cockblocking you with Simmons.” Dex and Simmons began sputtering and flinging denials all over the place. Seriously, it was a little sad how easy it was to wind them both up. She leaned closer to Carolina and lowered her voice to a whisper. “Ignore Dex. Fuck, ignore me if you’re not into it. Either way, though, I am crashing your next practice. I want to hear you sing.”

Carolina looked amused, though she disappointed Kai a little by not laughing again. She said evenly, “I think I can promise that you’ve never heard anything like it.”

 

* * *

 

Carolina wasn’t lying. Kai really hadn’t heard anything like Dex’s band. She might never hear anything else again to compare, though. She touched her ears, but didn’t feel any blood, so her eardrums were probably intact.

After a second, the ringing got quieter, enough that she could hear Caboose’s happy shout of “Hooray!” as he threw his drumsticks up in the air and clapped.

Tucker and Dex dodged with cries of “Come on, Caboose!” and “Buddy, we talked about this!” but Carolina reached up and caught one stick before it could hit her shoulder. The other clattered on the makeshift stage where Tucker had been standing a few seconds earlier.

Carolina wore a faint smile. “Well?”

Kai tried to think of something to say. She bought herself a moment pulling out her flask and taking a swig of her whiskey.

Next to her, Washington wore a fixed smile on his face; the lucky son of a bitch’s throat was still wrapped in bandages and Dr. Grey had him on a strict no-talking treatment, so he didn’t even have to come up with a decent response. He gave Carolina a double thumbs up though, and it managed to look both sincere and super sarcastic. She’d have to get him to teach her that, even if he was a fucking cop.

“Wow,” Kai said finally.

“Right?” Dex said through gritted teeth. “It’s such...an experience….”

“ _Wow_ ,” she repeated. She’d heard of people being tone-deaf, but Carolina took it to a whole other level. She tilted her head, and looked at Carolina consideringly. Then she nodded. “Bitch, you _really suck_. But we can make it work. Start singing heavy metal shit-- those guys can’t sing either, and it’s all about the screaming.” Her thoughts took a distracted veer into NSFW territory, imagining if she could get Carolina to laugh _and_ scream in bed, and then jumped as Carolina chose that moment to throw back her head and laugh.

Everyone, Kai included, stared while the sound rang through the room.

“I suck, huh?” Carolina said, and laughed again. This time Kai could appreciate the way amusement lit her face and creased the corners of her eyes. “I was wondering when someone would actually work up the nerve to hurt my feelings.”

“Wait, you _knew_ you sucked?” Tucker said. He sounded stunned.

“Tucker, I’m not _deaf_ ,” Carolina said.

“So you were just fucking with us,” Tucker said slowly. After a second, he grinned and shook his head. “I can’t even be mad, that was some fucking amazing trolling.”  

Washington nodded carefully, obviously fighting back a laugh of his own. He gave Carolina another thumbs up, this one completely sincere.    

“I’m sure everyone understands your joke and thinks it’s very funny, Carolina!” Caboose said. “No one is confused at all.” He laughed too, though it was obvious he had no idea what was going on. Tucker patted his arm and whispered that he’d explain the joke later.  

Dex sidled over to Kai and muttered, “I spent like ten months trying to get her to relax, and you make her laugh telling her she sucks. So, I’m not saying I approve, because I definitely fucking don’t, but… You should make her laugh like that again.”

Kai ruffled his hair, mussing it wildly before he grabbed her hand. “You’re such a fucking softie,” she said. She mimicked his voice. “'Gee, Kai, I’m not saying I give a shit about my friends, but I definitely give a thousand shits, so you have my permission to try and fuck all the tension out of--'”

“Jesus Christ!” Dex shoved her away. “I changed my mind. Never talk to Carolina again. Or me.” He shuddered and rubbed at his forehead. “Or fork over some money for my lobotomy so I forget we had this conversation.”

Tucker snorted. “Was he this much of a drama queen when you two were kids?”

“Uh, yes,” Kai said. “It was always bullshit like ‘Kai, you can’t fuck your biology teacher to get a C, that’s fucked up, she’s married and it’s illegal.’ Or ‘Kai, you can’t join Mom’s circus, you need to live a boring normal life.’ Or ‘Kai, I can’t believe you set up a webcam business where dudes paid you to--’” She didn’t get to finish that sentence either, because Dexter lunged forward and clamped a hand over her mouth. She rolled her eyes.

Tucker leaned forward. He stared at her intently, his eyes glassy in the way they used to get when she was riding him into the mattress back in Blood Gulch. He licked his lips. “What kind of webcam business?”

“None of your fucking business,” Dex snapped.

Kai made a note to explain it to Tucker later. It was her very first business, after all, even if the festivals and parties business was a million times more fun. She shrugged an apology at Tucker and watched his face fall. When Dex finally let her go, she looked at Carolina and said, “Like I was saying, stick with heavy metal shit and you don’t have to be a good singer. I still want you guys to open the music festival next weekend.”

“All right,” Carolina said, smiling faintly.

Kai looked around. “So, have you guys decided on a name yet?”

Carolina shook her head. “Caboose and I are letting Tucker and Grif fight that one out.”

“I wanted to call us Caboose and Friends, but everyone said no,” Caboose said matter-of-factly. Tucker patted his arm again and said gently, “Only because it was fucking stupid, Caboose.”

Kai looked between Tucker and her brother. “So?”

“All of Grif’s ideas suck.”

“Uh, yours suck. The Blue Goo Dolls? Motley Blue? Lame.”

“And Red Zeppelin or The Grateful Red is _better_?”

“Ugh,” Kai said, wrinkling her nose. “I’ll come up with something.”

She caught Carolina studying her. It was an assessing look, something thoughtful in the way Carolina tilted her head. Kai turned just a little so Carolina could get a better look at her profile. She’d definitely made the right decision to wear a tank top that day. Judging by the way the corners of Carolina’s eyes crinkled again, she’d noticed the gesture. Kai decided to take Carolina watching her as a good sign. Maybe Carolina was the kind of chick who needed to be the one to make the first real move. That was fine. Kai could be patient. Well, sometimes. If the reward was worth the wait.

Then she grinned, distracted by her own brilliance.  

“Fuck yeah! I’ve got the _perfect_ name for you sluts.”

 

* * *

 

Kai had bitched about Comic-cons and other nerd fests, but the truth was, she loved them all. It was fucking great to watch people have fun, especially when she was the one who’d put all the shit together and made something amazing. Now she leaned close to the mic, wrapping her hands around the stand. Her nails glowed in the lights, supposedly the same bright orange as her brother’s armor, if Donut wasn’t a fucking liar. They’d called a temporary truce-- she wouldn’t spike his next wine and cheese hour if he let her use some of the body glitter and glow-in-the-dark nail polish she knew he had saved for a rainy day.

“Hello, Chorus!”

The crowd’s yells crashed over her in a deafening wave, and she grinned. The energy of the crowd was like a drug, humming through her veins. She looked out at the sea of faces. It seemed like everyone in Chorus had come for the festival, though she knew there had to be people stuck working. The hospital couldn’t exactly shut down for the night and send all of its patients home. But it felt like everyone and their grandma had showed up. She even spotted a few UNSC soldiers stationed with that douchebag still negotiating the independence talks with Kimball who were either off-duty or had gone AWOL to party.

Her gaze returned to the front row, where the guests of honor -- Kimball, Grey, Niner, the lieutenants, and the Reds and Blues too lame to join the band -- stood. She grinned when she saw that Donut had managed to find glow sticks somehow. The entire group had them, though Lopez held his like he was contemplating throwing it at Donut or just straight up dropping it on the ground and leaving. Did robots give a shit about music? Whatever. There had better be a glow stick for her, or Kai was going to be pissed.

She raised her arms and yelled, “Who’s ready for some big damn heroes to rock your world one more time?” The crowd went wild, and she laughed. “Then welcome Red II Blue to the stage, fuckers!” She didn’t wait for her brother and the others’ big entrance, jumping off the stage as the crowd screamed.  

Simmons steadied her as she landed. “Thanks,” she said, her words lost beneath the yelling, but Simmons was already staring up at the stage, his eyes wide in surprise. His hand dropped to his side. His lips moved. She was pretty sure he said, “ _That’s_ what they’re wearing?” but she’d never been the best at lipreading. She sighed and shot Donut a commiserating look as he passed a glow stick to her and Katie clapped and said, "This is so exciting, Miss Kaikaina!" Kai and Donut had both argued with Dex and the others about presentation, Donut almost weeping over the lost opportunity to bedazzle some leather jackets, but they’d both been ignored. Apparently Grif and Tucker had researched heavy metal bands and gone with the messy, just rolled out of bed look.

She turned back to the stage. Dex was wearing his ratty Harvard T-shirt and tattered jeans. His hair was down for once, half-falling in his face as he bent to check his guitar. Caboose had found a shirt with a smiley face on it and apparently colored the smiley with blue marker. He’d shown it off to Kai that morning, apparently forgetting that she was color-blind. He was also still wearing his helmet. Tucker had found a shirt that said Just Say No to Paternity Tests, which was fucking hilarious. He’d bitched about child support for the six women he’d knocked up during the Temple of Procreation thing the entire trip back to Chorus. Then he’d actually met his kids. Now he was as sappy about them as he was about Junior. Kai was going to punch him if he showed her another boring video of some lame baby smiling or passing gas.

At least Carolina looked hot, even if she was wearing a fucking flannel shirt and jeans. Her sleeves were rolled up to her elbows. Kai tried not to get distracted by how much she wanted to lick Carolina's exposed throat. This close, she could see the easy way Carolina held herself, like performing in front of an enormous crowd was nothing compared to all the shit she’d been through. It probably wasn’t.

Carolina wrapped a hand around the mic and said dryly, “Hello, everyone. I hope you like heavy metal, because that’s what Red II Blue is going with tonight.”

The audience screamed encouragement. At least that’s what Kai figured they were doing. It was impossible to pick out any actual words from the deafening sound. As the yells died down, Carolina smiled and held up her fist. When she lowered it, Caboose began an epic drum solo and the first song of the night began.

Kai had been right. Scream out some heavy metal, and it really didn’t matter if someone could sing or not. And Carolina was mesmerizing on stage, the muscles of her arms flexing as she threw the mic stand around and half-screamed, half-sang at the audience. Kai stared at her hands, imagining them around her throat. It’d be even hotter than when the grumpy robot had choked her out. She couldn’t understand the lyrics, had already forgotten the three songs Dex and the band had ultimately chosen, but it didn’t matter.

Kai tapped her glow stick against her lips, hot all over in a way that had nothing to do with the crowd or the spotlights. She kept watching, the end of the glow stick slipping between her teeth. She only looked away when Donut snatched the glow stick out of her mouth and yelled into her ear, "Some things are very tempting to suck, but there's a time and place!" She was about to snatch it back when Niner leaned in close, her hand settling on Kai’s hip. Yeah, she was professional. She'd hold off on fights until after the festival. When the first song ended and Carolina paused to drink some water, Niner whispered, “I say go for it. The worst she can say is no, right?”

“You _really_ don’t want a piece of that?” Kai asked, turning a little to squint in disbelief. Niner had said so before, but Kai didn’t get it. She knew everyone had different tastes, but it seemed impossible that anyone would look at Carolina and not want to get wrecked by her.  

Niner shook her head. Her expression changed. Her smile went lopsided. “She’s… Well, she and Wash are the closest thing I have to family.”

“Oh,” Kai said, drawing out the word. “Gotcha, bitch. But you don’t mind if I…?”

Niner shook her head. “No.” She snorted. “Even when we worked together for the Freelancer Project, I thought she needed some fun. I dragged her to a few bars, but I never saw her take anyone home. Maybe you can get her to _relax_.” She wiggled her eyebrows, and then immediately grimaced, like she regretted the action immediately. “Just spare me the details.”

Kai laughed. “You should hang out with Dex. You two might get along.” Then she looked up as Carolina stepped back to the mic and launched into the next song. She kept her eyes on Carolina for that and the third song.

When the last song ended, Tucker stepped forward to join Carolina at the mic. He grinned. “Thanks, everyone. This has been fun. And if any ladies would like to meet me backstage, I am definitely--”

“Get me back up there, pencil-dick!” Kai called, cutting through his lame attempt at being suave. She raised her hands. Grimacing, Tucker leaned down and grabbed her hand. To Kai’s delight, Carolina grabbed the other. Together they pulled her back onto the stage. She hugged Dex, ignoring how sweaty he was, or how annoyed he was going to be when he realized she’d rubbed glitter all over him.

“Wow, this didn’t actually suck,” he said. “I guess you did okay.” His mock-surprise didn’t hide the pride in his voice, or stop the smile that spread across his face as she stuck out her tongue and said, “Of course, bro. I am a bitching businesswoman.”

“Hey, as long as it doesn’t involving fucking webcams, I’m behind you one hundred-- eh, eighty percent.”

She stuck her tongue out at him one last time. Then she stole the mic and grinned back out at the crowd. “Give them another ovation, fuckers.” She waited for all the screaming to die down. “I’ve got a few things to say before we get to the second portion of this music fest. First off, a big thank you to President Kimball and the Chorus council for letting me throw this for you guys. Second, a huge thank you to Big Bro and his friends for singing tonight! Third, a big thank you to all you sluts for knowing how to party!”

That got another round of screaming. She waited that one out too, fishing her flask out of a pocket she’d had sewn specially into her dress. She drained it and then threw the flask off the stage. It bounced off Lopez's visor and Sarge growled something about dirty Blue backstabbers, attacking decent robots who were just trying to enjoy some music, before Simmons patted him on the arm and calmed him down. She ignored them all. “Next time I’ll have more than one fucking band for you guys to cream yourselves over, but tonight you get to enjoy the universal premiere of Red II Blue and what I’m calling the thousand-person karaoke. We’ve got screens set up all over the place with the lyrics as each song plays. You can sing if you want or dance or whatever.” She grinned. “And all the songs are requests that I got from you guys over the last two weeks, so it’s gonna get eclectic as fuck in a minute. Enjoy, sluts!”

Kai was about to jump back off the stage when someone touched her shoulder. When she turned, Carolina was smiling at her. She was flushed and sweaty too, and it took everything in Kai not to reach out and curl her fingers into the short hair falling over Carolina’s ears.

“Want to join me backstage?”

Kai was fighting her instincts so hard that it took her a second to realize what Carolina had asked. She blinked, staring, and finally registered the invitation in Carolina’s smile and the way her hand lingered on Kai’s shoulder. " _Really_?”

Carolina’s smile turned guarded. She didn’t move, but Kai still got the sense of the other woman withdrawing. “Is that a no? I mean, you asked me out within thirty seconds of me taking off my helmet in front of you, so I thought--”

“No, that’s not a fucking no!” Kai said quickly, leaning closer as the first song began to play. She didn’t know it, but it was apparently some Chorusan pop song from before the civil war. The crowd loved it. She winked and added, “I just didn't expect you to ask like that. I've been imagining you just straight up dragging me into a closet and having your way with me.”

“No, that’s your brother’s move,” Carolina said dryly. She made a face. “Forget I said that. What happened with the Temple of Procreation stays with the Temple of Procreation.”

“Okay, you say that, but at some point I _will_ find out what went down with Dex that day,” Kai informed her, pointing a finger. “He’s being fucking squirrely as hell about it, and I’m sure that shit is hilarious.”

Carolina made a non-committal noise, and then smiled as Kai added, “Good thing I am a genius and gave you a private dressing room. Even if you dickweasels all threw on dirty clothes for the show.”

“Hey, this is a new shirt,” Carolina said, sounding serious.

Kai snorted. “Fine. At least you can pull off lumberjack chic. I was mostly talking about those other bitches. I am pretty sure Dexter sleeps in that fucking Harvard shirt.” She grabbed Carolina’s hand. “Let’s go.”

 

* * *

 

As soon as the door closed behind them, Carolina picked her up and pinned her up against the nearest wall like Kai weighed nothing. It was super hot. Like, Kai was seriously worried that her brain was going to actual overload and melt from the hotness.

“Fuck,” she breathed, wrapping her legs around Carolina’s waist so that Carolina could use her hands on her. She ran her own fingers appreciatively over the coiled muscle in Carolina’s arms. Then she went to work on the buttons of Carolina’s shirt. “I bet you could choke me out with just your thighs.”

Carolina cocked her head. That thoughtful look was back, but this time it had heat behind it. “Was that a suggestion?”

“Oh hell yeah!” Kai said. She braced herself against the wall, shifting herself just enough that there was enough space for her to grope Carolina’s rock-hard abs and palm her ass. “You have my permission to fucking wreck me. It’s not a good time if you don’t leave a few bruises.”

Carolina took that as permission to grab the hem of Kai’s dress and push it up over Kai’s thighs. She paused just long enough to betray surprise that Kai was going commando, or maybe that Kai was already wet. Then she laughed and shook her head, her nails scratching up Kai’s thighs just hard enough to leave red marks, not quite hard enough to draw blood. “Niner mentioned you liked it rough. I guess she wasn’t kidding.”

“Aw, did you ask about me? That’s hot,” Kai said, and then sucked in a hard breath as Carolina’s hand found the sweet spot between her legs.

Her thumb rubbed hard, and Kai swore, arching into Carolina’s touch. She grabbed a fistful of Carolina’s hair and yanked her head close. She kissed her like she’d wanted to since that helmet had come off and she'd seen that fucking gorgeous face. Carolina kissed her back, matching her punishing kiss for punishing kiss. Kai bit at that full lower lip until it split against her teeth.

Carolina laughed and got her back with a stroke between her legs that made Kai writhe and bang her head against the wall so hard that she saw stars.

Kai kissed every inch of skin she could reach, pausing only to breathe and admire at the collection of marks she was leaving across Carolina’s throat and shoulders, the mess she’d made of Carolina’s hair, how Carolina’s breasts heaved with exertion, the light trickle of blood from the cut in Carolina’s lip, the way her face looked when she was turned on. It was hotter than any porn Kai had watched, and she’d watched a _lot_.

All the while Carolina touched her with a surety that made Kai suspect that Niner didn’t know her friend as well as she thought she did. Carolina had definitely done this before.

Too quickly, Kai came, pleasure jolting her from head to toe. She slumped against Carolina, dropping her head against the other woman’s shoulder. Carolina took her weight easily. She pressed a kiss against Carolina’s neck and mumbled, “Give me a second, and we’ll see if you can choke me out.”

“Oh, I can,” Carolina assured her. Kai honestly almost came again just from the confidence in Carolina’s voice. “But we could save that for Round Two.”

“Round Two _and_ thigh choking?” Kai grinned. She’d been planning to eat Carolina out while Carolina's thighs did their magic. Showing off her own fingering skills worked too, if there was going to be a second time. She fumbled with Carolina’s jeans, getting them open with a grunt of effort. She was going to have to introduce Carolina to yoga pants. They were much easier to slide your hands into. “Bitch, if monogamy wasn’t for pussies, I could almost fall in love with you.”

Carolina laughed. “Don’t say that in Grif’s hearing. I think his head might _actually_ explode.”

Kai made a mental note to repeat herself the next time she saw Dexter, just to fuck with him.  But that was all the time she had to spare for her brother. “Whatever. Now, I’ve been wondering if you’re a screamer. Yes or no?”

Carolina raised an eyebrow, smiling. “Why don’t you try to find out?”

“Bitch, challenge accepted,” Kai said.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think Kai/Carolina keep it casual, but joke's on Kai if like six months from now she wakes up next to Carolina and goes, "Fuck, I've been sleeping with the same person for months??  
>  Bitch, you BROKE me!"


End file.
